he hasnt tried to contact me anymore thank gosh,not just becouse im in treatment in getting rid of this std he gave me but we arent any good for each other at all ,he is about drugs hard rocknroll tattooes and alcohol,vodka and sex of course,im to the oppisite,church,prayer treatment liveing a good clean life not trying to be boastful or anything but its just facts,opisites do attract but dont always go together,i started remembering my self as a smalll child around 6 and up and remembering how id tremble from head to toe shakeing all over when my dad would go into his outrages with his drinknig which he drank all the time never knew what he would end up doing ive had to witness some awful sites with him and my poor codependent mom that tried sooo hard to give me and my siblings a life but it was pure torment and when im around someone that smells of alcohol i find myself shrinking away ,even with my a/d ex b/f now,id pull away from him and make excuses to why i didnt want to be bothered or pawed at,the smell makes me sick and i mean literally sick ,funny how that as a child memorie happened to come to me just lately,anyways just dropping in to you all know im doing alright for now ,dont know about tomorrow,i have to live in today only its all ive got right now,hopeing it gets better and all goes away soon,i have to realize though its only been 3 days so im trying not to get my hope to high that its gonna be all over with soon it takes mths or even yrs,but at least ive made it back here to alanon,where i belong also,i do have faith in the program ive been here for yrs but id be bad to go inactive for yrs or mths at a time ,not allowing it this program to really work for me,,,,hugs to all,and ive made 2 meetings here so far so im on the right path.love and hugs .....silent