New here, not sure where to start - Al-Anon Family Group

MMVS2012 · Newbie

New here, not sure where to start

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi M, for me I hunted for all the Al Anon literature I could find. "Getting

Them Sober" Volume one by Toby Rice Drew, is very easy to read, and so worth it.

When we get some education about the disease of addiction we then do know more of what we are dealing with and can make decisions that will make us happier.

We all need to vent everything and anything out, this is the place to do it.

Your husband is very sick, if you have ever been on pain pills you might get an idea how it can kill your desires. Not that that is the true reason, just may be part of it.

I chose not to live with it anymore. My circumstances made it dangerous for me to. I am sometimes sad about being w out a mate, but I am much happier and healthier. Life can be so much better.

There is also a chance if you choose to stay to make it more tolerable.

Keep coming, there's lots of good experiences here to learn from.

You are not alone!! love,debilyn

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Aloha MM and welcome to the board...I've been there and one this also until I could no longer and when I could no longer a Power Greater than myself ushered me into the rooms of the Al-Anon Family Groups. I had resisted before and then ran out of resistance competely. What worked for me and works for me now is Al-Anon and that is what I will suggest for you along with your courselor and all the other family here. Glad you found us, welcome, stick around and read much more and then let us know how its working for you. (((((hugs))))) smile

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi MMYS Welcome to miracles in Progress

I urge you to follow your counselor's suggestion and find Alanon Face to Face meetings in your community.

Check out the meeting schedule by going to the following link:

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html

Alcoholism is a progressive disease over which we are powerless. We did not cause this disease, cannot control it and cannot cure it.

Alanon meetings provided me with a place to recover myself from the devastating effect of living wth this disease.

Attending meetings helped me to beak the isolation, One Day at a Time, Focused on myself, with compassion and wisdom.

Keep coming back You are worth it.

Wolfie55 · Senior Member

Welcome to MIP.

Debilyn is right, you are not alone.

In our readings it says and I quote, "We who have lived with the problem of alcoholism understand as perhaps few others can. We, too, were lonely and frustrated, but in Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless, and that it is possible for us to find contentment and even happiness, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not."

So, for me, it wasn't about getting them to stop, it actually wasn't about them at all. It was about me, it was about whether I wanted to be happy regardless of what they were doing. In the end, I didn't stay in it. But as I say, that's how it was for me. Keep hanging around here, get to some face to face meetings if there are any in your area, there is hope for your situation as there was hope for ours.

Dolly Llama · Senior Member

Welcome. Al Anon truly saved my sanity. Maybe even my life.

My husband has multiple addictions, too. In my experience, that addictive sickness will find a way to express itself, unless the addict is working a recovery program of course.

When is the renter's lease up?

You aren't alone, please keep coming back.

AStrongerMe · ~*Service Worker*~

This is in no way a recommendation, my family is in the housing industry. There is a provision for leasors where for "family emergency" ( you, your parents or children) can invoke a 30 day eviction. But I don't know if all states have it but many do. This is just information, my favorite line in regards to decisions is that we do not have to make a decision right now. It's helped me to give myself all the time I need before I make any decisions.

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

Glad you've found us. Maybe you'll choose to keep coming back and include this site and the chatroom in your recovery. The step board will help you gain understanding of how alanon works and there is lots of loving support to be found here. If you're feeling very alone with your problem right now, in person Alanon meetings are a great place to shed that feeling. There are lots of kind words of comfort and hugs to go around if you're open to it. You'll meet others going through what you are who will share their expereince strength and hope with you and you'll have the chance to see Alanon recovery in action by hearing how others are doing and how they are working the Alanon program to make positive changes in their lives and live a healthy and serene life. If you decide to give it a try, please stop back and tell us how it went. If you like what you read here, and the unconditional love and support you are receiving; you can take it as testimony of what you will receive at face to face Alanon meetings because many of us are in meeting rooms too. You're worth it. TT

-- Edited by tiredtonite on Thursday 12th of April 2012 06:55:46 AM

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

My exAH used to deny me sex and use porn daily. It was just another way to use control and manipulation. I am sorry you are dealing with this and am glad to hear you still know you are attractive, I didn't know that anymore after all the rejection. I agree with your counselor and others and hope you can find local Al-anon face to face meetings and keep coming here to post. The book "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews was a great book. I am glad you found us here at MIP! Sending you love and support!

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.