The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Before al anon I wanted to plaese others all the time.
I wanted to be accepted
I could not say no
I was naivte believing that all people were good.
I was over conscienious, always willing to see another point of view an give them benefit of the doubt make excuses for their nacceptable behaviour.
I used to over intellectualise they do this because of this it is not their fault.
I was emtionally dependent
too trusting
easily impressionable, trusting and empathetic.
Today I live in reality. It is my responsibility to love and care for me. I have to have boundaries for how I will let people treat me. I have to have flexible boundaries that protect me because some people are very ill.
My partner ex is sick again after picking up a drink. he has apologised for this to me. i have told him that I love him but he needs to love himself. I feel good not guilty. I am protecting myself from his disease . I am setting boudaries I will no longer ingage with sick people .
You're working a wonderful program!! Keep up the good work!!
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Hey, you described me!! I too was so naive. I believed that all people were good. I always gave the benefit of the doubt. (They would love me on a jury). I was trusting and empathetic to my own fault. Now I believe that there is evil in this world and it is my responsiblity to myself to guard myself against it. Boundaries are so necessary, but also movable.
This is wonderful. And you could have described me, as well.
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Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible be found in us. -from Pema Chödron's When Things Fall Apart
