The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I prayed for clarity and wow did HP deliver!!! I have communicated more with my AH in the past week then in the previous 9 months.
We sat on the porch yesterday and talked for hours. He hasn't had a drink since Thursday, and I know that this could change at any time his recovery is his own, I simply asked him to consider visiting an AA meeting and then I left it alone.
I made my point a few times over that moving forward life will not be like the previous 9 months. I don't want to hate being married. I know that I am a work in progress and nothing changes if nothing changes.
We talked about how he needs to allow me time to process what he tells me that I don't have to fight to win I prefer flight. I always have.
I have accepted that my husband and my mom are so much alike and in being at my parents this week I can see where my inability to communicate with my husband is nothing new, I struggle communicating with my mom too. I have accepted that I can't change my mom's opinion of my husband, and I don't have to have her approval.
This has been a time of reflecting and prayer and reading, lots of reading! I'll be going home, and we will be starting fresh. I will continue to work my program, I will continue to post. I'm thankful for Al-Anon, thankful for the board! Thankful for the clarity.
Driving to visit my friend Saturday there were 3 songs that came on the radio, Blake Shelton "God Gave me You", Keith Urban "New Day" (might not be the name but it's the song he sings about there's a new day ahead) and the 3rd song Tim McGraw "Better then I used to Be". All 3 songs just followed up on the many other points of clarity I had over the past week last week.
Clarity is an awesome thing!!! You keep working on you and the rest is going to fall into place.
Hugs and support, P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I understand the 'don't want to hate being married' thing, too. So glad you found some time to sit with him and talk. Sending you lots of support this week!
I don't listen to much country but sometimes I love it. I will have to find those songs. Thanks Jackie.. This is going to be crucial for you, I believe, this time to pray and read. You are so strong and work such a wonderful program. Glad were in this together.
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Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
