I Feel Stuck in an Enabling/Codependant Living Situation - Al-Anon Family Group

SusanThomas · Newbie

I Feel Stuck in an Enabling/Codependant Living Situation

SusanThomas · Newbie

I prayed, I wrote on this board which is the first and only time I have explained to anyone/anywhere what's going on...I finally let go and let God.
And, lo and behold - My God Works Wonders - I woke up this morning to an unemployment check...I will be relieved from my living situation. It will take a little time to get my ducks in a row, but I will be okay, God takes care of me. I hate those moments of doubt that I still have, you would think after 50 years of being saved by God's Grace in so many difficult situations that I would "get it", God always take care of me, in spite of my moments of doubt

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Susan

Welcome to our MIP Board

I awoke this AM to your post and thought "What a beautiful Testament to Trusting HP and the Power of Prayer!!!

I found that breaking the isolation by coming here and attending alanon face to face meetings were invaluable tools in maintaining my connection to my spiritual growth and my own well being.

If you are not already dong so I would suggest that you search out Alanon Face to Face meetings in your community They can be located at: following link:

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html

Keep coming back here and sharing as well

Michelle814 · ~*Service Worker*~

My husband is an alcoholic/addict. I come from a family full of alcoholism and untreated Al-Anons. Al-Anon has saved my life. I am a much more serene person who can give away what I have no control over to my HP. I have ups and downs but overall I thank my HP for leading me to my first Al-Anon meeting. Hope you can find some hope in the program. F2f meetings, literature, and this board. keep coming back.

orchidlover · ~*Service Worker*~

Susan: I can give you my ESH. More than 7 years ago I came here in much the same way, living with an addict, alcoholic, surrounded by enmeshed relationships. I grew up in an alcoholic, crazy, abusive, enmeshed, totally suffused in secrecy home.

I felt lost, shamed, angry and abused when I got here. I also felt at home. For once in my life this board was somewhere to come and really get honest about my life. I certainly was honest posting on here day and night. I got incredible support, love, care, tenderness, direction and most of all interest. I found people who cared about me who had something to give and wanted the best for me. Over time I got willing to walk the steps and take on the direction of a sponsor.
Through thick and thin I got to have a "family" which I never had here.

Over time I developed boundaries. I learned what they were, I learned what enabling was rather than beat myself over the head with how sick I was. I learned how I fit so very well into an alcoholic situation.

Over time I learned I deserved more, needed more and needed to take lots of action to get more.

I left the alcoholic/addict. My life didn't have a fairytale ending. I struggle financially, I had to learn to be independent.

What I believe is one of the biggest miracles is that I know where I end and others begin. I know my limits. I have them now. I know where taking care of myself is on the priority. I'm not last on the list anymore. I know how to take action every day.

Am I out of the woods yet? Far from it. But I do know I am loved, cared for, cared about and deserve better.

I can recomend this board to help. I can also recommend a book called Getting them Sober. No one comes to these rooms looking for help without enormous pain. I can guarantee you will find help here if you are willing to ask for it. I can guarantee you will find peace and clarity too. All you have to do is want it and make time for yourself to get it.

Maresie.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.