The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well last night was our first Valentine's Day and it was our first night with all of our kids spending the night together with us. He's really working hard to be a better dad to his two and be a dad to mine as well. I am really proud of the effort he's making and he's very proud of his progress since becoming sober and clean and also since getting off all of meds. His mind is clear, he's able to stay calm and focused even without anxiety meds. He knows what kind of dad he wants to be and is striving for that.
Me...I see where I need to be and striving for that too. I have goals for myself and am working toward those goals. Us both working to better ourselves for ourselves is bringing us so much closer. Still rough days and I know there will be from here on out, but they don't have to be "horrible" days like they have been in the past.
He's even been able to detach from old friends. He got a phone call from a good friend he used to use and drink with. He was in jail and needed money to get out. Instead of just taking a check to bail him out he just called a bondsman and sent him his way. He wasn't getting involved any further than that. He was so proud he was no longer in that situation and did not want any involvement. I can see he's growing and changing and his life and the life of his two boys are becoming more important than the drugs and alcohol and anyone associated with it.
We're growing together, him through AA me through al-anon and both through our HP. It is a very exciting journey! One just a few months back I was terrified to start, but willing because I loved him. And now here we are finally on the same page, searching for peace and serenity, and just keep holding on one day at a time!
"The more Im me, the more you're you." I love that quote
When I first came to al-anon I was afraid this talk of God and spiritual living and along with it, I was feeling this urge to stay aware from drinking.. I thought my life was going to be so boring. I was wrong. I am having fun on this journey. My HP makes things pretty exciting for me.
I have found that the more I work on me and my program, the closer and farther I feel to and from my husband. I feel close to him spiritually and in a healthy, romantic way. I feel far from him in a needy way. I feel more like I can take care of myself, and in doing so, I give him the space to grow. Its so magical. who would have thought I would be saying this. Eight months ago I thought the world was crumbling. "Just went the caterpillar thought the world was ending.. she became a butterfly."
I know many people find the need to end a relationship upon coming to al-anon and sometimes this may be the case. I can only speak of my own experience, and for me, it has been the opposite.
Thanks for sharing your journey with us, stefani
__________________
Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
