balance?need to hear ideas or someone who understands - Al-Anon Family Group

1 day at a time · Member

balance?need to hear ideas or someone who understands

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Why don't you both go to open meetings together? If he feels comfy with that. I loved going with my AH.

I am so happy for you all. debilyn

1 day at a time · Member

i think he likes his closed meetings better right now.

stefani74 · Member

My only meetings are an hour away. Tonight I have a meeting at 6 and he is going to one right in the next room at 6:30. The women in this al-anon meeting go join in the remainder of the aa meeting when ours is over. So we get to enjoy the hour ride there and back together and stop and have dinner somewhere. Same on Sunday...there is one at the same time for him, so we get to spend that time on the drive talking and just being together.

And when he's going to his local aa meetings, I join him when he asks me to. He likes for me to go and it has helped me learn a lot about alcoholism that I didn't understand before.

likemyheart · ~*Service Worker*~

Curious, what does he say about the topic? My perception (not experience) is that a man in AA who is trying to stay sober and work his own program would understand the benefits of you giving the same dedication to your own program. Maybe some open conversation and brain-storming of solutions is in order? Its what I would want to do if I was in the same type of situation, I really like conflict resolution.

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

You like whats happening now , early sobriety is difficult but remember where your serenity comes from ( program) it is important to keep going to meetings not just for yourself but for the relationship. I am glad you enjoyed your nite together , perhaps if there is a meeting on the same nite as his , you can meet after for coffee .. this is called alcoholism not alcoholwasm , program keeps us grounded and the focus on ourselves .. just my opinion . Louise

Lindaoakford · ~*Service Worker*~

In my opinion, it may be more conducive to continued sobriety and serenity if something else were rearranged.
It is because of the meetings you got to be at this point.

Don't stop taking your medication just because you feel better... Its the medication that is making you feel better.

My parents used to go to a meeting on the same night. That way, one of htem was not at home alone. My Mum used to take me with her and I sat in the middle of the floor playing wtih my crayons. At bigger meetings I remember other kids being there and we used to sit together and play or have a sleep or whatever. I was 8 at the time.

I perfectly understand wanting to spend time together.... It is beautiful when they are back to being themselves. My hope for you is that you find another way of doing it instead of sacrificing the source of your serenity... your program.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.