Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: New and unsure.


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 6
Date:
New and unsure.


I'm new to all of this, so I apologize if I say, or do anything that is against the etiquette of the board. I left my husband last night after years of progressively worsening alcoholism and lying, which has become worse in the past year. We have a 6 month old and i won't allow my son to be around anyone who cannot control themselves. My husband does not believe himself to be an alcoholic because he goes days, sometimes weeks without having a drink. He often binges and tries to cover it up. I've confronted his lies many times, even asking him to take a breathalyzer, but he broke it in half, which tells me he was definitely drinking. I need advice and support so that I do not return or enable this destruction any further. Thank you!

__________________


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 401
Date:

Welcome! I am so glad you found us here. I know personally how painful and confusing it is to live with this. When I went to my first Al Anon meeting a little over a year ago, my kids were 2 and 5. My husband's worsening drinking and irresponsibility at times with my children (other times he was wonderful) were horrible to live with. I was confused by the dry spells, so it took me a long time to finally realize there was a problem. The meetings helped me TREMENDOUSLY. I received information, support, compassion, understanding, and a new way of handling this problem and my life that saved me and my family... sending you support! big hug

__________________


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 6
Date:

Thank you! It sounds like we may have a similar situation. It makes it very hard when the husband is a hard-working professional who wants to care and love for his family, but can't. Good for you for getting your children out of the situation. I decided when our son was born that I would have a zero tolerance policy and my husband has already "passed out" while caring for our son while I was only away for a few hours. I'm not going to let it get to the point where everything is lost. Thank you again for you kind words!

__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 987
Date:

hi and welcome,

so glad you have found al anon wish I would have found it while my children were still babies.  This site has helped me so much as everyone understands what it is like to love a person who suffers from the disease of alcoholism and the pain it causes the family.

My partner is in AA today thankfully and fighting his illness and I am in al anon trying to understand what the disease did to me.  I love this site but I also need my face to face meetings they help me so much.  even when I have had period away from my partner we no longer live together as we are both trying to sort ourselves out. 

We do not give advice on this site as evey situation is different but I would suggest you find your closest al anon meeting it will be of great support while you try and work out what it is you need to do.

 

hugs tracy xxxx



__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3972
Date:

Hi and welcome i can relate to your share! I hope you are able to find face to face Al-anon meetings too. I am sending you love and support on your journey!

__________________

Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3854
Date:

Hello and welcome , put baby on your hip and find the nearest Al-Anon meeting you need support from people who understand exactly how you feel.  A few months in this program and you will be able to make an informed decission about your future rather than one based on emotion and fear . Now is the time to take care of you and baby , get your life back on track and remember that leaving your home was the right solution for you at the time , you did what you thought was best. Louise



__________________

I came- I came to-I came to be



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3870
Date:

I can also relate, you have already received great ESH and I know without the alanon face to face meetings I wouldn't be where I am at now. It's so important to know you aren't alone and you have a support system in place for yourself. What is in your best interests will be in your child's best interest as well.

Keep coming back, Hugs P :)

__________________

Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 818
Date:

Welcome to MIP. There is hope in Al-Anon whether the alcohlic is drinking or not. You are in the right direction. Keep coming back.

__________________

Michelle!

No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 12
Date:

welcome!!! smile you are definitely in the right place!!!

I encourage you to find face-to-face Al-Anon meetings in your area. I would also encourage you to get phone numbers from as many people as possible in the meeting, every meeting. Each person has something to offer ... perspective, if nothing else. We all have different experiences but we all have one key thing in common ... the disease of alcoholism.

I encourage you to get a copy of How Al-Anon Works and read it. It will help you understand the disease, the program, and yourself.

I also encourage you to find a sponsor and work the steps.

Finally I encourage you to share here ... in meetings ... with other members ... your questions, your problems, your successes ... so that you may grow and help others to grow.

Your first success? You reached out here! You have made the first step of what can be an incredible journey! I know! I'm on it smile

I wish you many more successes! God Bless You



__________________

There are people in your life whom you unknowingly inspire simply by being you.

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.