The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I had a movie playing while I worked this afternoon about a woman married to an abusive man, lots of kids, depression era type of thing, set in sweden I think, it had subtitles anyway. One scene - the mom and all the kids are in the kitchen giving one a bath and doing various things, dad comes home drunk and fighting, drags mom into bedroom and the kids cry at the abusive noises coming from the bedroom, older girl starts singing a song to distract the youngers from the trauma.
I have a vague memory of sitting at the top of the stairs with my siblings and hearing my mother crying out, sounds of slapping, etc. I know that this kind of thing happening in my childhood is probably why I put up with the verbal abuse from my ex-ah (2nd marriage); and emotional neglect and abuse from my 1st ex - with my first marriage all he had to do was threaten to leave and I clung to him, pleading he stay, doing everything he wanted to make him happy; boy I am so dysfunctional! not really I figure, because it took me 24 years to leave the first one, it only took 2 years for the second time around.
I want a healthy adult relationship with a member of the opposite gender; I'm willing and able to wait for it to come along; AND I'm willing and able to live without if the right one doesn't come along.
Understanding your roots gives you wings.
__________________
I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
