The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Last night I didn't get home until very late. I had to work my restaurant job and then I had to stop at the store. Baby girl's birthday is today and we are having just family over for birthday cookie and ice cream. I had to pick up the stuff to make the cookie as well as other odds and ends. When I got home my AH was already asleep.
I got everything put away and finally around 1 was able to crawl into bed. Which woke my AH up because he's not a sound sleeper. I fell asleep and later on woke up to realize he wasn't in bed and I needed to visit the bathroom. I walked into the living room to the smell I hate. I didn't say anything just went back to bed. Not sure how to address this one as this definitely pushes my boundary with it being in the house.
This morning I woke up to get everything done and I was laying there thinking the first thought was I should vaccum, then I checked my motive for making that the first thing on my list. So instead I've put away dishes, made the cookie, put away those dishes, started a load of clothes and will get the bathroom cleaned before I vaccum.
I'm just at a loss as far as the fact that I can't be any clearer that this should not be smoked in the house so now I have to pray and request guidance on how to communicate and then determine what action I have to take the next time, because to me it's unacceptable.
I admire your tenacity in applying what you have learned from your program as your experience unfolds. It is a great reminder for me to check my motives more often and more honestly Sending you support and best wishes on you daughter's birthday. My sponser reminds me to enjoy the children even more when my AH 's choices are making me unhappy. Easy does it. hugs.
Great post and I can just feel your struggle...ugh!! no...arrrgh!!! however take a gander at "Glads" share on control and see if it has any support in it for you. Might want to get a spray can of "Glad" LOL or Febreez (?) to help clear the air some...((((hugs))))
You show a lot of awareness. What I've learned is that boundaries have to have consequences. Did you set up the next action when you made the boundary? This sounds like the time to think about it. Alcoholics don't exercise control over their drinking and in my experience they don't exercise much control over where they do it either. They might keep it out of the line of sight but if they could stop doing it easily, they wouldn't be alcoholics. So the boundaries are up to us. I'm so glad you're working your program so thoughtfully. Hugs.
Thanks for the share, great awareness!!! It works if you work it and you are working it girlfriend!! :)
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Great post and I can just feel your struggle...ugh!! no...arrrgh!!! however take a gander at "Glads" share on control and see if it has any support in it for you. Might want to get a spray can of "Glad" LOL or Febreez (?) to help clear the air some...((((hugs))))
LOL I took your suggestion both in reading the post and the febreez!!!
You are working such a solid program, Jackie. That is a tough one. You are running around doing all the work and it is frustrating. I have been there. I feel for you. No one can bring you down though. You HP is right beside you, you are never alone and you are making a little girl very happy. Good job setting your boundaries and sharing. I feel enlightened just from sharing no matter what ESH I receive, though that helps too.
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Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
I actually went for a run and came home and my husband was cleaning the bathroom. The rest of the day was awesome. I'm glad that I have a program to work, and thankful for this board!!!
