The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It was a great open AA meeting I hope I'm not breaking any major taboo by sharing some of what I learned tonight.
The speaker was amazing 20 years of sobriety. What I found so fascinating is their description of literally once they decided to stop drinking they never had another drink in fact in the first 5 years of the program, stopped smoking, got off caffeine (not even chocolate 17 years!! I'm seriously impressed .. lol), worked a good program however guess what .. still felt like 1/2 a person. 7 years into AA, they struggled every day.
The realization came that they were more than just an alcoholic that they are also a human being as well that needed to be knitted together.
It's a shame on many levels that more recovering alcoholics don't turn to alanon as a tool of recovery because it is so much about coping skills. Maybe I'm way off base on this .. however every time I go back to the events in the not so recent past and even my past .. I know my coping skills are broken I just don't have the luxury to numb out. I have faced reality stark raving sober and that's not an easy job to do all the time. I can't imagine having them be completely stunted and not knowing where to go with them.
I have a few what if's flying through my brain tonight and that will pass. It's not going to keep me up tonight .. it's the idea that while my Q may never take another drink it doesn't mean not drinking is going to fix everything or even going to AA is going to make things easier on them. I love my Q and don't want them to suffer in this way, that's the part that is cringe worthy allowing them to either suceed or fail without it being about me. I know I prefer to avoid the pain in my own issues, I don't like to watch my Q struggle with theirs.
It was so good to hear that the speaker did get it although they never went to alanon they found out that they are defined as an alcoholic they are also a human being and for some weird reason that brought me a lot of comfort.
Thanks, P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Open AA meetings are awsome , and I agree its too bad a recovering alcoholic dosent find our program too .. my sponsors husb always directed his sponcees to Al-Anon to learn how to live he said AA will keep you sober now live like its a good thing.
I always gain a lot from listening to recovering A's. I used to think (or hope rather) that as long as my AH doesn't drink again, everything will be fine. While I realize that physical sobriety is a requirement of recovery, it's no way near being enough. This breaks the spirit in a way I never understood until recently. And it nearly broke mine too, but as you say I was stark raving sober! Thanks for the share. Hugs, nyc
I was just having this conversation with my AH the other night. He says it seems al-anon would benefit him and I said the only requirment is that someone you love has a problem with drinking.. he has enough of those. Maybe some day down the road he may want to attend al-anon. I agree that some people in AA would benefit once they feel they have worked their program enough, try both.
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Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
