The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am home today with two sick kids and just sitting around so I picked up an old book about parenting that is one of those 'makes you laugh and cry' books called "I was a really good Mom before I had kids" (it is SO GOOD) but I had read it three and a half years ago when pregnant with my second child--long before Al-Anon and when I was in the thick of active alcoholism with my AH...Anyway, my point:
There is a section on guilt about parenting, but to me this applies to guilt in general (which I really struggle with dealing with my separated AH)...when you are feeling guilty, replace the word 'guilt' with 'regret'...does your idea still make sense? If not, the guilt is unfounded, if it does--then think about how to make ammends.
For example, "I feel guilty about making time for myself today" would be "I regret making time for myself today" Ah-ha!! It changes the entire persepctive! I can't wait to apply it!!!
I love this and have already shared it with someone else .. it's just terrific way to look at self imposed guilt vs what is a necessary guilt (my version of that is guilt that motivates us to change is a positive guilt).
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
