The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
In Hope For Today on December 25th there is a beautiful page that reads all the explanations of serenity. My favorite is where it says that the character defects are not something "bad in us but traits that we no longer find "useful" and we are ready to remove them so that the more useful traits can shine through. This is serenity to me because instead of dwelling on it.. why did i do that, why did i say that, why did i act that way.. I am accepting that they were not "bad" choices but all I knew to do at the time. My husband's coping skills, when deep in his addiction, were to use drugs and/or drink when he was feeling anxious or down about himself or shameful about his past... my coping skills were to control others, talk about others behind their backs, holds resentments when someone did somethig that I did not agree with.. why don't they do it like this.. if it were me i would... well it was not my choice to make.. and guess what, Michelle, YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT!! I am humbled with serenity now to accept that each person is an individual with a soul and they are allowed the same room to make their own mistakes as I was and am. It's beautiful really.
So I ask you guys here on MIP.. what does serenity mean to you?
__________________
Michelle!
No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
I found serenity Friday night, in remaining calm, in praying as I worked. Then when I went to bed I was able to sleep restfully, I had handed everything over.
Sometimes it's taking a deep breath. Sometimes it's literally saying I'm handing this over. Sometimes it's acknowledging that I don't know and it doesn't have to be my way every single time.
I'm also learning that just because things don't always work out the way I think they should or would it's still ok, and you find the good stuff to be thankful for.
I think my idea of Serenity has changed over the years. Today I have a simple definition of that powerful state of Serenity that it is:
A calm knowing deep within that no matter what happens my Higher Power and I will be able to handle it.
That does not mean my outside world will be perfect--- In fact, with the death of my husband and my son I felt all the painful emotions of loss and grief that is possible. That is normal and human the serenity never left me.
. I did not descend into the black hole of despair, I traveled deep within, found HP and my peace and asked for healing.
I think for me serenity is about for once valuing myself and being proud of myself no matter what.
All the things I have been through in my life no longer seem like something to be ashamed of but something to marvel out. How did I survive that. Whatever I did was all I knew how at the time and there is no need anymore to criticize it. I can for once put my life in perspective rather than be in "if only". I have no idea where I am going but I know for the most part with the help of al anon it will be for the better....
I have had to give up "if only" in order to be accepting of my life.
Today im confused so cant answer what i think serenity is.... But i did want to say That i really like each definision!!! Good post to read! Thank you!!
