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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Update only, no drama [ YAY! ]
Post Info TOPIC: Update only, no drama [ YAY! ]
rara avis


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Update only, no drama [ YAY! ]
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Hey everybody,

 Just and update for anyone who's followed my endless breakup, I don't want to create a mystery since I've been here less often. [ computer implosion plus business ] 

 Long story short the stay away order is in effect and my ex did  not show up for the hearing, thank goodness, he went into my attorney's office to sign the papers. He cannot be arrested for violating it, but if he does I am supposed to file a report, etc....more ammo for a regular restraining order. So far he has not contacted me or been around in any way, which makes a WORLD of difference! I've been slowly asking neighbors to let me know if they see my ex RA around, it is a lesson in humility to ask for this [ ei let them in on my business ] but obviously it is important to have extra eyes around. 

I've pretty much been in a low for a while, overwhelmed w/ life to-do's, low self esteem, then sick of feeling like the little black cloud etc...etc...! Honestly I feel like the little turd my ex left on the floor. Everyone here can probably relate.  I'm very safe though still jump at certain kinds of trucks ,noises at night, and knocking on my door. Been reading up on verbal abuse and bullying which has been informative. Crawling through my days and hoping they get better. Using all the tricks - exercise, friends, dog, puttering around the house, counseling,  alanon, pizza. 

 The odd blessing is, whenever I feel like I screwed up, whenever I feel sorry for my ex, I visualize the turd on the floor. Who knew that THAT would be doing me a favor! fyi my stay away includes a 100 yrd parameter around me [ and the dog! ] which I call The Force. I like to think of it as a sort of bug zapper. Here comes the ex.....steps over the line...ZZZZZZAP! HA haaaa! 

 Thanks for being so supportive, and know that I read the posts here even if I don't respond. I'm listening! You guys are awesome. 

 hugs 

rara avis

 



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Jackie11


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rara avis wrote:

 The odd blessing is, whenever I feel like I screwed up, whenever I feel sorry for my ex, I visualize the turd on the floor. Who knew that THAT would be doing me a favor! fyi my stay away includes a 100 yrd parameter around me [ and the dog! ] which I call The Force. I like to think of it as a sort of bug zapper. Here comes the ex.....steps over the line...ZZZZZZAP! HA haaaa! 

 ZZZZZZAP This made me laugh!!!! What a great perspective!!! So glad to hear that you are doing well, that you have extra eyes watching, and pizza is always a good thing!!!



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Debilyn


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lol thank you for the visual of poo on the floor!

PIZZA so how bad can life be? I bet you get pumpkin chocolate cheesecake too!

So your life is perfect! (c:

You sound good. Puttering around is nice, I like that. cept I end up going outside in my nightgown and slippers and find myself raking leaves.....haha

OH I love love love my power box and metal line! Wanted to put it up on my pretty string of lights and greens on my fence. Some idiots kept pulling it down!

HUGs, deb



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
Pushka


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Hugs RA,

I really feel that in the long run for your own peace of mind you will be extremely happy that you have this in place. It IS a good idea to let others know what's going on in this situation.

Congrats on moving forward now, and choosing to take what you have learned and see it in a positive light. No more monkey houses for you!!! :)

Hugs P :)

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
likemyheart


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Cheers Rara - you know, that maybe defines the insanity of this life, to rationalize not only pooping on the floor (it was an accident!) but not cleaning up after you've done it (I forgot......) Thanks for keeping us posted.

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I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Update only, no drama [ YAY! ]