The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
How ironic that I hate roller coasters and yet my life has become one. Up one day, down the next. Ugh.
My AH continues into some kind of mental unhinging. From 3 nights ago, total meltdown rage, to last night total manic high. I am starting to think he has mental illness on top of his addictions or his addictions have caused brain damage. He is going from one extreme to the next on almost a daily basis and it is all I can do to cope.
Last night's manic episode really challenged me but I kept repeating to myself that no one could take away my serenity but me. He kept trying to gode me into a fight, passive aggresive insults, loud talking, bouncing around, he literally tried every thing I think he could think of to get a rise out of me and I simply didn't bite. Took all the energy I had, went to bed at 8pm but I did it! Love to all you out there, your words of wisdom really to help during these times. Am going to a meeting tonight, can't wait to get there. :)
Congratulations to you for holding on to your serenity and precious energy. It takes two to fight and I am so glad you decided it wasnt worth it. Great job working the program.
Sounds like you did a fantasic job last night! This really inspires me as I am currently detatching from my AH's bad mood. An al anon friend reminded me that my spouse is not my higher power, and I try to remember this when I am tempted to orbit around him and his issues. Again, I thank you for sharing your strength! Sending you lots of support.
You did a great job holding on. That roller coaster is somethign I have been on for 43 years. My AH is diagnosed as bi-polar & manic depressive. With the drinking and the mood swings I can totally relate to your story. Hang in there and know it's possible to actually enjoy a roller coaster ride....I jstu have to get off now and then and catch my breath!
no one can retain serenityy all the time - through moments of someone else's mental health may hem....its just not possible- unless you were a spiritual guru who used extreme meditation techniques or something. but i think sometimes- in situations like this- all we can do- is put the kettle on- watch some dross on tv and push someone else may hem out of yur mind as best you can....
The metaphor of the roller coaster and visioning it along with feeling the feeling of not wanting to be on it...helped me get off of it just like you have. When I got off (visioning) the roller coaster and would not under any circumstances get back on for anyone my alcoholic/addict got the picture that I had lost my ticket to ride and was done. She stopped some of her behaviors because they wouldn't work anymore. Keep practicing with love for self and for the sick person. Keep coming back ((((hugs))))
