The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
could carry on reading th link- ended up crying my eyes out. i do hope things turn out ok for you. i sure it will- ive seen lots of people come back from the brink.
Wow... a very powerful story of your journey through a terrible situation in which no choice is "right".
I've been there myself, repeatedly, trying to decide whether or not to tell my parents information that they can use to have my sister involuntarily hospitaziled (she's schizophrenic and sometimes suicidal). Sometimes I make one decision, sometimes I make the other... but in a situation like that you *always* end up feeling guilty, no matter which decision you make.
For me, knowing that *every* outcome of the situation leads to guilt is the one thing that makes it bearable... since *any* decision (including not making a decision) leads to badness, that means the badness is inherent in the situation, *not* the fault of the decision-maker... all you can do is try to pick the least-bad option.
An afterschool special I watched once many moons ago was about this kind of thing, the father, played by some beefy guy, can't recall his name, took his son, played by emilio esteves, camping - he was losing him and took him to the only place he could think of - a place where they had good memories from the past, someplace away from the drug world the kid was mired in. At one point, the kid was rummaging through everything looiking for the car keys and the dad says, they're pinned to my underwear. He did what he had to do to save his life - of course it was an afterschool special so everything was hunky-dory at the end. Thing is,, I applaud you - i get so frustrated with parents who take this "kids will be kids" attitude, or, ignore the kid until its too late - Tough Love isn't just tough on the ones we love, it is tougher on us!
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I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
