The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
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I want to wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving. Please don't feel alone. I too will probably be alone, I have texted my A-Son and sent him 2 emails, but still have not heard from him. I will go ahead and cook turkey because I love to eat turkey and have leftovers. I know for sure I am growing in character and self worth, thats why I CAN be alone. When you are unsure of yourself and not grounded it is hard to be alone because you will end up thinking of yourself and your life situatiion, and if you don't like where you are at it can be depressing. I think of all the people who don't have a warm house and a oven to cook in, and I am grateful for what I have. I have choices and I am making the best ones.
In Support, Oldergal
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Don't Worry About Growing Old, It Is A Privilege For Some Of Us.....
Thanks for the wonderful posting full of Hope and recovery. You are so right- being alone does not have to mean being lonely. HP is always with us and learning how to satisfy our needs,and relax is a true gift.
Thanks oldergal. I wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving too.
Last year, I spent the day with me, myself & I. It was a wonderful opportunity to become aware of my growth. I did not feel alone. I felt very comfortable with me. It was a day of reflection and being.
This year is quite different. I will be hosting a gathering. I busy preparing the traditional foods for this holiday and enjoying every moment of it. And I don't even eat turkey! However, my guests do.
Not a good time of year to be a turkey (literally).
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
If I could really be at peace with myself....really truly...and if I could just sit with my thoughts and not need to be distracted - That would be an ideal thanksgiving. It is malarkey about always having to be around others on the holidays. I honestly think the goal of alanon is to be at peace with yourself (actually of all 12 step groups). Hence, I admire your state of mind. It is strength based and it is grounded in reality and not self-pity. Even after working on myself for a while now, I'm much closer to being okay with being alone whenever the time calls, but it's still not my favorite thing.
I have embraced the day alone and could have invited a man over just not to be alone, that is what I did last year, but I am making better choices this year and I enjoy my own company now. Thanks for this post, I am celebrating this year of how far I have come with my recovery program! It is almost 1 year ago that I started Al-anon and found my sponsor and I tell you it has been so great to feel the growth, changes and love for myself begin and now flourish. I feel healthier than I have ever been and I am very thankful for sure this season of my life. Things don't have to be perfect to be beautiful. Sending you all love and support on your journey's.
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Enjoy the day!! Your holiday!! Thank you so much for the share!!
Hugs P
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I read once that being alone and being lonely are entirely different things. I've had times when I was surrounded by people, yet felt very lonely, and other times when I was alone, and felt totally satisfied, relaxed and peaceful. I've learned it's about quality and not quantity. Wishing you a very happy Thanksgiving!
Thanks for this post OG and for the thread that follows. I actually spent last Thanksgiving alone. I hinted to my family that I would be with friends and I hinted to friends that I would be with family. Then I cooked something reasonable for myself, made a wonderful fire in the fireplace and watched Jane Austen movies to my heart's content. I had NEVER spent a holiday like that before, but it felt right at the time and I"m glad I did it. It was really nice. This year, I have just canceled a trip to visit my parents and will probably go over to a friend's house for a small gathering with her family. I will mostly be alone this weekend. I do feel sad and lonely, but I know that this is a stage of grieving and will pass as time goes by, as I continue to learn and change with this process, and as I develop healthier relationships in the future.
I tried to cook a nice thanksgiving dinner once and it turned out so bad that my dogs even grawled at it! So, I think I'll find someone to spend the afternoon with, that knows how to cook, eat and then run home to enjoy the rest of my day alone, but not lonely...
I'll do something stupid but have fun doing it, like well, make a video of some sort, to share with the forum here, or play with my laptop doing some blogging, facebookin', hang out in the MIP chat rooms, ..ect.
I am grateful that I can be by myself today.
I remember asking my sponsor whats the difference between you isolating and me isolating? He replied..."I get to be by myself, you get stuck with yourself".
He was right... I'm glad I'm not stuck with myself today... I am simply by myself.
John
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" And what did we gain? A new life, with purpose, meaning and constant progress, and all the contentment and fulfillment that comes from such growth."
Ok, this is gonna sound like I'm off my head but - there is a part of me that WANTS to at least once in my life spend thanksgiving dinner eating at a Denny's. Don't ask me why, I don't know, but sometimes I think it should be a required experience in life. Our small town has started having a community dinner, which I may attend if they have it next year or later - right now I know I have only two more wtih my kid still home, so, what she wants goes.
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I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
Thanks Likemyheart, for the chuckle about Denny's, it took me by surprise after reading all the sentimentalilty ...
I don't think I would go to Denny's for Thanksgiving....Because I think you would have to be so together and confident that you could just walk in there alone......I'm not there yet, but it may be something to reach for!
Thanks, for that post.....Oldergal
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Don't Worry About Growing Old, It Is A Privilege For Some Of Us.....
