I worked the program this weekend, for real I think - Al-Anon Family Group

Lindaoakford · ~*Service Worker*~

I worked the program this weekend, for real I think

Pushka · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs Linda,

Way to go! It's progress which is always a great great feeling, especially when the results are a nice weekend, a nice day. Those are the feelings to go back to when it's a harder day or weekend.

The days where I feel the worst I remember that WOW .. I know that I can and will feel better. I remember that great feeling I had yesterday or even the week before and it helps calm me that the world is not going to end and that no matter what I"m going to be ok.

Hugs what wonderful progress for you, keep up the good work!!

Hugs P :)

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Good Job Linda

Way to GO!!!

glad lee · ~*Service Worker*~

"For real"..... I absolutely love it. That's the way it worked for me. First I gained al-anon "knowledge," but then I had to make it real and practice it.

Lately, I am trying to avoid taking the first "think." Because when I do, it sets up the "next think" and before I know it, I am no longer emotionally sober.

My negative thoughts do NOT serve me well, yet, my brain will bring those thoughts up regularly... I can count on that! It's up to me to stay vigilant, to practice precision of the mind, (meditation helps me with that)... to let those thoughts exit as quickly and easily as they entered. Telling my brain, "thanks but no thanks." Happens all day long, sometimes. Sometimes, I take the "think" and in a short while, I'm calling my sponsor because I am not well.

What do I get out of watching someone's behavior... especially when I believe they're going to "mess up?" I get a big fat ego trip. I get to say, "You're doing it WRONG!!!" And of course, when someone is wrong, that must mean I am RIGHT... woo HOOoooo... my ego loves that. That is usually my motive for keeping someone under the microscope, I don't have to pick up the mirror.. because God knows, there is MUCH WORK to do on my side of the street. As a codependent, I have an addiction to emotions, and I sure like the emotion of feeling superior. Anyway...

I applaud you, my friend, you're doing well ((hugs))

-- Edited by glad lee on Sunday 30th of October 2011 08:17:48 AM

tommyecat · ~*Service Worker*~

I think your last line says it all, "I had a nice weekend" that is progress. Congrats Linda!

GailMichelle · ~*Service Worker*~

Lindaoakford wrote:
Maybe I am starting to get this a little more???

From what you wrote here, I would say YES!

nyc018 · Senior Member

Sounds like you've done a great job Linda. It is amazing how a shift in thoughts can keep us on the right track. Keep up the good work!

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

A little!? You have been really working the program Linda. I am really impressed. It's not easy to do.

When my AH would say "anything about his drinking or not or whatever" I said thats your business not mine. I care about you, I am sorry you have this disease. Sometimes I even said I am so so sorry you feel so bad.

I actually told him not to talk about it to me,that I could not do anything anyway. That is what AA is for. I am not his counselor.

But for you if you chose to, you could also tell him, as I did, that it is his decision not yours.I would say I love you and change the subject.

I am so happy for you!! Linda you both will feel better. People, all people want to be loved for themselves and more in spite of theself. we cannot change each other anyway. I remember being mad when my first AH would smoke pot. We had babies so it bugged me. Told him that if something happened I need to be aware and ON. I have babies now who need me. If there is an emergency I cannot be loaded.

In many ways I was over kill. Very protective, very on, very exausted. Took the babies to the doc for a check up and he said he was more concerned about me.

Anyway I am hoping this new wonderful feeling is going to blossom in you.

Sorry I could not chat. I was just going to bed and have a headache again. This cold and this asthma are a drag. BUT I am happy!

hugs hon! love,debilyn ps I invite you to hug him a lot......(c:

pinkchip · ~*Service Worker*~

It sounds like it's working for you Linda. Step 3 is all about letting go and it sounds like you worked step 3 a lot here. It seems you are starting to work the steps without fully intending to which is a great thing. Getting a sponsor and doing them formally would really work wonders for you cuz you really have the mindset to do it right.

Mark

Cupcake · Veteran Member

It sounds as if you are doing so well. I think sometimes we have to fake it until we make it. I sometimes don't feel like taking care of myself but I push myself to do it anyway knowing that it will make me feel better in the long run. Even if I fall into some stinkin thinkin, I redirect myself. I might not have my whole heart invested in it but I am taking some steps (sometimes dragging myself along kicking and screaming, LOL)
I am so glad you had a good weekend. What a joy to have a pleasant weekend and to know that you made it happen!

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.