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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Asking for help
Post Info TOPIC: Asking for help
usedtobeanyer


Senior Member

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Date:
Asking for help
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My face to face meeting tonight was on asking for help. It made me realize how much I am missing out on in this program in that I don't ask others for help. In thinking about it, I realized that this is undoubtedly a result of my childhood and growing up with alcoholic parents. My parents drinking was a secret, something to be ashamed of and certainly nothing to talk to others about. And we never, ever talked to anyone about it. Now that I am in this situation with my wife, I am carrying that same thinking with me. As a result, I almost never share in meetings, I don't talk to others before or after a meeting, and I don't have a sponsor. I'm a year into this program and I am missing so much because I don't ask for help. 

It works if you work it--I've heard that a million times but I think now I'm understanding just what it means. Working the program means a lot of things, but it means asking for help and leaning on others. Without that, you're just not going to get everything you can out of this.

Thanks for letting me share! 



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Jerry F


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 13696
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Okay...you got the solution.  That was great now you gotta do the walk to get the things you want from this program, its membership and your HP.  You're not alone...I did the same thing until I had the same realization that then I chased the fellowship all over hell and back raising my hand and asking, "Hey can you please help me?"  And then everything changed.  Remember that you are in a fellowship where before we learn we take helping over board.  It's your time now...so ask and do.  ((((hugs)))) smile



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Debilyn


~*Service Worker*~

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Glad you shared this. It's nice too when one tells others specifically what they can do also.

I hate being a burden so have tried all my life to do things on my own.Now when I am really needing it, they are not used to me needing.

My son is starting to get it some. Daughter is there if I share.

so I hope when ya need help, you express that. Makes people feel good to help others!

you come up with such great threads! love,deb



__________________

Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
RLC


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1483
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Usedto,

Sharing is a part of the program that has given me the help and support from my f2f meetings I needed. I learned from other members ES&H after I shared, what worked for them. No different from your sharing during the past year on MIP, you have shared your heart, and received ES&H from members of this board and then applied it in your life. The same holds true in your f2f meetings.
Jerry said it best....It's your time now...so ask and do.

In Support,
RLC

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flopadopilus


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 662
Date:
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You got it! Being vulnerable was so hard for me, but the growth I received from it was huge! Keep up the great awareness! Sending you courage and support!

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God grant me the serenity 
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference. 

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
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