The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I Can Honestly Say, I don't Remember a Time I was this Tired
HP Has Sure Been Steppin Up for Me Here Lately, and Thank Goodness, because if not the Insanity would have placed me in the Rubber Room By Now! ... ;0)
But I'm Still Standing... I have Spent 9 days out of the Last 13, at 4-6 Hours a Night in a Hospital after work, and Now with Having My Gram Upstairs & My MIL Down, it has been a Journey thru Time... Funny how Two Souls, can be so Different...
Once I Sit Back, and Take the Time to Look into their Eyes, I can See the Fear.. My Compassion for both is Unbelievable, but My Helplessness at Times is the Most Overwhelming...
I have been Living (If I'm Lucky) on 3-6 hours of Sleep, and i Can feel the weight... I Have No Regrets...And Feel Very Blessed to have them Still in My Life...
This Morning When I Woke up and Got Showered for Work I was Lightheaded and just assumed it was sleep deprivation, but thinkin Harder, I Realized an Entire Day Past By and I hadn't had a Drop of Food other then a Latte I Got on the Go! And With Me being Borderline Diabetic, Well Needless to say I was Sugar Deprived...
So I Decided Some Nella Wafers, and Fresh Air Might be the Trick... This was the 1st Mornin It was Nice enough to Sit on the Porch due to the Cold snap.. I Sat out there, with My Coffee, My Wafers, and My Husband... And I Allow the Weight of the World to be Lifted...
I Took Notice to HP For Sure, and then the Fun began... I have Pine Trees that sit 6foot from my Front Door all in a row, with Electrical Wires that Run the Backs of them ... And In My Back Yard is a HUGE Walnut tree... Well the Squirrels started Coming from Every direction.. It was the Neatest thing... One Would Come up the Lines, another up the Trees, Chase Easy Other around the Yard, they would Squack at Each other, and try to Chase one another Away from the Walnuts, it was So Commical...and I Sat and Laughed with my Husband about it, and i Told him... God Knows This is Just what I Needed... Just these little Moments to Prove that "Life Will Go On"...
Regardless of my Struggles, as Long As I Keep some "Little Moments" and Accept things for What they are, and Stop trying to Control, or Figure Every thing Out at Once, Instead of what I Precieve them to be, or what I Want them to be... I am in a Good Place... I Got that Here...
I'm a Firm believer that ALL things Happen for a Reason, whether I See it Right Away or Not, Or Believe it or Not, and tho this has been a Tough Road, I know that the Life Lessons I have learned from this Will Stay with me for a Long time...
Please Continue to Pray for My Family... My Gram Got Moved to the Rehab Floor Yesterday, and I was with her for that, and already this morning they was going to have her up and Moving around, so Im Praying Hard that She has a Great First Day ...And Plenty of Rest...
My MIL, Has been Struggling, She has not Doctored in Prob. 40 yrs...So Long the Fear Of Being In that Place is I Believe Causing her to Lash out Some, Plus the Meds she Is NOT Use to having... but the Way I See it... If She's Lashing Out at Someone, she is Def Still Got the Fire in Her! She Never Wanted to Be in the Hospital, and Is Very Voiceful about what she thinks of us all puttin & keepin her there, BUT... If Not we wouldn't have her Still, So She May be Pissed, but She is Still HERE!
Tonight My Son has a Game Out of Town and Frankly I Can Not Wait to Go... Its Going to be a Long Drive, but Thank Goodness, I don't have too...Friend Of Mine Volunteered so I Get to be Nappin if I So Choose =) I Am Also Saying a Prayer that My Nephew that has been thru so Much will Also Join Me for the Game.....Little Things... Little Things... Little Things... Are for Me... The Most Important... & The Most Cherished Of All =)
Thanks to ALL for the Continued Prayers, I'm Recieving them, and Am Most Grateful...
Love, Hugs & Prayers to Each & All here... Your Continues Support Means the World to Me... For this Too Shall Pass... I have no Doubts About it... On HP's Time.. Not Mine!
I have been thinking of you and am so glad to hear your grandma is better. Things are going to be what they are self care is the order of the day. Eating is a good thing as well. (I'm shoulding you .. lol) You gotta eat and you gotta rest or you aren't any good to anyone else least of all yourself.
Thanks for the update your morning coffee date sounded lovely, I'm glad you got some much needed quiet time.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Wow, you always amaze me seeing the gratitude in the heat of it! I love the mental picture of the squirells! I am sending you and your family prayers. Keep up the great program!!!!
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God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
I know how hard it is to have days and weeks that you are experiencing. You are doing well Keep on trusting HP, taking care of yourself and placing principles above personalities and you will come thru this difficult time.
Your family is very fortunate to be able to count on you.
I Can Honestly Say, I don't Remember a Time I was this Tired 