The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The drinker in my life is my mother. I have only recently come across alanon and I am a bit apprehensive to attend a meeting. Although the concept sounds really helpful.
My mum has always enjoyed going to pubs and socialising and her and her now husband even made a career out of running different pubs for a while. The problem is they now drink every single day, at least a bottle of wine each if not more and I do not know what to do any more.
I have recently moved home after working away for a while and its heartbreaking to see her so sleepy and not really with it. Tonight she asked me the same thing 3 or 4 times as if I hadnt told her before.
I know I cant get her to stop drinking, I think I am just looking for people in a similar situation to give advice and look for a way to make me stronger when things get bad.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, I appreciate your comments no matter how short.
Welcome to MIP. I am so gald you found us. I too know what is is like to have a parent who is an alcoholic. I grew up in the family disease of alcoholism with my father being the daily drinker always passed out by 6 PM. It is a long and winding road watching someone who is wasting away. The 3 C's of Alanon come into mind. They are:
You did not Cause it
You cannot Control it
You cannot Cure it
I would encourage you to attend face to face meetings. It was so helpful for me to hear people share from their hearts what their experiences are with their loved ones who struggle. I felt the love, hope, acceptance and understanding in the face to face meetings of Alanon. Should you decide to give it a try, it is recommended that you attend six or more meetings before making a decision as to whether or not alanon is right for you.
Please keep coming back here and post. I do so appreciate the opportunity to get to know you better.
I understand the way you feel about attending your first Al-Anon meeting. I was very apprehensive as well.
It took me years to finally attend my first meeting. It took me about 6 to 10 meetings to feel somewhat comfortable with the format and all. I strived to keep an open mind and listened intently to people's shares.
I'm glad that I pushed myself to keep going back initially. I've only been attending for 7 months, but my life (my attitude towards life) has changed immensely for the better.
I hope you will give meetings a very good try!
Keep coming back her at least!
__________________
You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
Hi and welcome. I live in a small town and had a hard time walking in my first meeting. But once I did I took off and found the love and support I needed and after awhile even a great sponsor. Keep up the good work!
__________________
God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
Hi lovelybertha! Welcome :) I felt unsure about my first Alanon face-to-face meeting, and actually had a hard time getting over that unsure fearful feeling for the first few meetings, but everyone was so welcoming and accepting and supportive. It was really helpful for me to have that face to face accepting group of people and to hear directly from them about their lives and experiences. I'd sure encourage you to give it a try.
Thanks to everyone who responded. I am hoping to get to a meeting tomorrow. I just wondered what the general process is for the forums. I have posted again on my original thread, but dont feel ready to comment on other people's.
Just having a bad day and came here to be surround by people who understand.
