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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> self care
Post Info TOPIC: self care
Tracy


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My Abf has hit his rock bottom again. I know he is ill and I am trying to be caring however he stole money and was aprting with some girl who is not a lady put it that way.  I have made amends for my reactions to his latest slip but now he thinks everything is back to normal.  Today i told him I need space as i am angrey and although I know he is sick I do not want to say things i will regret.  I understand it is a disease but the unacceptable behaviour still hurts



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Pushka


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Stolen money and partying with another girl, you have every right to ask for some space. Yes, he has a disease, however he is still responsible for his choices. I think I read a great quote like that from somewhere here on the boards from a recovering alcoholic I wish I could remember who posted it. I have gone to that many a time when I feel myself start to back slide.

So sorry you are going through this right now, I hope you will go for a walk, or go for a meeting, clear your head. Do something that will help you feel better.

Hugs in support,

P :)


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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
GailMichelle


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Keep the focus on you, your children and what is best for you and them.

You know you can't slay his demons, so to speak.



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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light.  Lama Surya Das

Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die.  Malachy McCourt
pinkchip


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Tracy - It's confusing but you have to draw the right boundaries for you.

Telling someone to screw off and get out of your life may not be something to regret if it's what is needed. Telling someone "You treat me like crap and I'm done with it" can be empowering. Yeah, you do want to stop the endless cycle of arguments that have no resolution but you can also take a stand and stick by it. There is a fine line between accepting what you can't change (his alcholism) and changing what you can (that part you let him play in your life). Alanon is not about learning to put up with being hurt and disrespected.

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tommyecat


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Tracy,

I just wanted to send you a {{{{hug}}}} 

In Support,

Tommye



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Hoot Nanny


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I totally am starting to understand "self-care"--a lady who has a lot of time in the program put it so simply that I could understand. Now I think about it more.

Kathleen



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Hoot Nanny
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