The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
After months of reading, visiting this board and working on myself I finally went to a f2f meeting. Wanted to share for others that have never been but want to go.
It was not what I expected. I don't know what I thought it would be. We spent very little time talking about the addicts in our life, we talked about ourselves. At first I was confused - why aren't we talking about the reason we are all here, our addicts? Then it occured to me, this meeting was about ME, we get so used to being consumed with our addict, how they feel, how they are doing, etc. This was one peaceful, blissful hour when I just got to think about ME! I left that room feeling so calm. Many people came up to me after the meeting and hugged me, total strangers reached out and gave me support. I have spent so much time hiding my issues from the world, you can't talk about living with addiction in polite company, so we hide, shrink ourselves to fit our situation and plod on alone. And yet there I was in a room full of people that without saying a word I knew they understood and I understood them. I will be going back. I wish I had done this sooner, I know with every day now that I am getting stronger, calmer, and putting myself in a better position to make choices for my best interest.
Hugs, what a wonderful share I'm so glad you followed through on a meeting it's one of the most important things you can do for yourself!!!
Hugs, P:)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I am so glad you shared your experinence of your first face to face meeting. This post as you said may help others that are on the perimeter of the program, afraid of walking into the door.
Alanon is a saving grace in my life. Thanks so much for passing on your experience today.
Your post is so well stated. I'm certain that it will nudge others to try Al-Anon. Thank you for coming back here and sharing your experience.
Yes, in Al-Anon you will find understanding without even having to spill any details. You can just sit and listen if you like. No one forces you to share (talk).
Al-Anon's program is a life-changing experience. It will impact your life in ways you can't imagine if you practice it.
Hope you continue to come back and share your ESH. Thank you!
Take good care, Gail
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
I am so glad you went and so glad you shared how good it was here :) Thanks for that. And you are right, maybe someone else out there will see this and decide to go for the first time :) Meetings are a great place to begin to work your own program of spirituality.... HUGS!
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-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
I'd like to echo Surfgirl's thoughts on face to face meetings.
I went to my first last Monday, and can't wait for my second tonight. I can't express how calming, soothing, and centering it felt to not feel alone. I walked into the meeting a bundle of nerves not knowing what to expect, but anticipating judgment. After all, I hadn't admitted that I was powerless over my wife and her drinking, and somehow still felt embarrassed and ashamed for her alcoholism and my codependence. What I found was acceptance, understanding, and fellowship. What I left with was a better understanding of what was wrong, and a sense of strength that I'm not alone and happiness is ahead.
I listened, one by one, as each person shared - astonished each and every time at how relatable all our situations were, in one way or another. I had the option to remain silent or speak; when I tried, I broke down and bawled like a baby -- still nothing but fellowship and support.
I left feeling calmer, focused, and centered than I have in years. I'm happy for you, Surfgirl, that your first meeting was a success. From my experience and all I've heard, that seems to be the norm. For those of you that haven't gone or are hesitating, I'd recommend it.
Thanks surfgirl and superhero (Brian?) for your shares about meetings. I also found so much relief and release and comfort from the face to face meetings. Wish I could go more often.
I read recently a post from someone uncomfortable about going to a meeting because she was sure she'd cry - I would venture to guess that nearly everyone cries at some point. Some cry a LOT. I cried in several meetings. Then you just say you're done talking. The amazing, wonderful, powerful thing is that it's OKAY! The meetings I have been to have been so accepting and understanding. I never felt alone or judged. I felt safe and supported. I would guess nearly everyone who finally drags themselves into a face to face meeting is beyond their breaking point and ready to cry. I just wanted to keep telling people it's okay.
