The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
So these last couple days have been pretty wavey, but I have learned so much about myself it is quite amazing really...
I have learned I am No Were near Perfect, and that I still Struggle with "Reacting", and recently I am attemping to polish that up a bit! I have learned that tho I Still can be Loving and Caring, I still can be quite Cold with Tons of Resentment & Pent Up anxity!
Isn't that why I am here? To Learn & to Grow, and to find a better way then my old habits! I believe it is, in my resent struggles, I have learned that it is time for me to break the cycle and just get back to living life for me on lifes terms... I can not control the thoughts & minds of Others & Frankly I no longer have the desire too... I can not take what another precieves and make it make sense, and I don't always have to justify the things that I do, for whom i do them or how I do them! I Truly Love my Family and tho at times I Guess that isn't Enough for them, its really none of my business how they see/percieve things..
I know that I have mentioned before that i Learned that NO was a complete Sentence, and I didn't have to explain Why the Answer was NO! Well that works for others, but a Very Wise Soul brought it to my attention that NO also means NO when I am Talking to Myself! I have to be Strong Enough to say to myself... NO.. Your Not going there, Thee End! No Your Not Taking my Spirit, or My Peace, because I have worked to hard to find it!
So ya See.. Even tho I have accepted No as a whole sentence for others, I Never Put myself on that list and felt it applied to Me.. Not to Myself! and since the Rose Colored Glasses Slowly started to Clear up, I now see the next step for me!
Last night I got some Much Needed time with another Al-Anon Friend, and Just sittting & Sharing was Nice, we went to dinner and then afterwards hit a Meeting and it was just what I needed... I Needed to be Refreshed, and thanks to Those Here, and my F2F Family, I Now see myself In a Better Place, being accepting of the changes... and accepting of my Over Run Mind at times!
I realized that tho I have been showing up for my Program, and I have been Hitting my Meetings I still at times find myself overrun with just everyday things... My Life has become Very Busy these last couple of months, and tho I am Rolling with the Punches at times I just Need to Back Up and Slow Down... I know that God only Gives me what i can Take and He is in control not I! Sometimes I Just think he has more faith In Me then I have in Myself...
Sometimes tho like anyone, when dealing with Alcoholics/Addicts it just becomes To Much, and when it does it is time to put the focus back on me, and away from them and there disease! I Can't cure them, I Didn't Cause it, and I'm not going to sit by and allow it to Control Me! their disease, is not my problem... My Biggest Problem is ME!
Such a Grateful "Learning" Al-Anon/ACOA Member, and D$mn happy to be here!!!
Thanks for Letting Me Share... Going At it One Crazy/Eventful/Less Insane Day at a Time!
Jozie, what do you mean you aren't perfect?? I thought everyone who posted here was perfect?? I'm sooo in the wrong spot! :) Darn it I want my money back, .. wait a min .. I didn't pay any money did I? :) I know I'm perfectly imperfect and it's a really great place to be. :)
Loved your share, it's so awesome to come to the realization of what is really our issue and what is just not ours to deal with, this past week that has saved me a ton of grief of my own making.
You are so awesome, I always enjoy reading your shares!! Thank you for allowing me to join you in your journey. You give me a lot of hope that there is always that light at the end of the tunnel. :)
Hugs again, P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Another wonderfully honest share!! Progress not perfection is the key to this program The Courage to Change has an ancient Chineese Proverb that states: Donot be afraid of growing slowly, be afraid of standing still.
Being Honest, Open aand Willing is HOW ths program works.
lol... No I Removed My Halo A LONG Time ago...lol.. Some would say that I am Arrogent but Hey! It was Time to Hand it off to those that Assume Greatness... :0) I'm Just Accepting Of Progress... ... Thanks for the Complements... I Do try, but I also Learn alot from those here... Funny how when my parents told me to do something I did the Opposite but When I hear & read ESH Here, I find I am Capable of Change.. Good Change...A Better Change... So Thank you My Dear for Being here... Because YOUR Journey is Just as Important as Mine... So Keep Coming Back :0)
(((((((((Hotrod)))))))))
Welp :P I'm Not One to Stand Still Long Love... So Growing Slowly seems to be the Ticket for me... I have you also to Thank for All the Growing I have had over the last 2+ years... You are a Wonderful Steady in my Program, and I am So Grateful for your Program as well... I Love the HOW.... Thanks for That... Much Love & Respect always....
... Thanks for the Complements... I Do try, but I also Learn alot from those here... Funny how when my parents told me to do something I did the Opposite but When I hear & read ESH Here, I find I am Capable of Change.. Good Change...A Better Change... So Thank you My Dear for Being here... Because YOUR Journey is Just as Important as Mine... So Keep Coming Back :0)