Welp... Made it back safe and sound from my 1100 mile Road trip on my Harley :0) It was Beautiful, we went around the Finger lakes in NY and there was a lot of Very "Country" settings, which is what I love... And being close to the lakes & water was for sure a Bonus... We didn't get Much time to take in the Alot of Sights, due to Time Crunch but when your driven a bike the Window's show you more then you can imagine from a Car... No Obstructions, just Wide open beautiful God's Country... I Truly could not of as for More!

However, Then I Came Home!  And being gone a whole whoop in 8 days of course I had to return home to Drama, and Childishness as Usual... It Truly does Sadden me that some people just can't stand allowing others to be happy. It saddens me that they feel the need to talk down, and belittle others, including Children so they can feel superior...  because they can't accept the Changes that came their way out of their own doing!

I truly am OK with my Life In General, I see the difference in my son who is becoming very fastly a Young Man... I have also learned that I Need to Learn From him his ability to allow things to roll off his back... He too was hurt by the resent goings on in our family this last couple days, with Remarks Geared tord him, and the Ignorance of his "Family" and he is very open to tell me how he feels and when he was done he just looks at me and says, " But Mom... Its OK! I know what I have done, and You have done, so the Rest really doesn't matter now does it!" And the First thing that Popped in my head was... Exactly... "How Important is it?" He is But 13 yet Wise beyond his Years :0)

You know I have made choices All my life, Some were Forced upon me as a child when it come to Helping Raise my Baby Brother, and taking care of the House when My Mom worked 3 jobs to keep the heat on, and tho there was a Time in my life that I Truly resented my Mom & Dad for what (I thought) was a horrible life to live, and I did feel very Alone ALOT... But Now Looking around at those that Had there Mom and some Their Dad and yeah they had struggles too, but their struggles turned them into a HARD Hearted people... Mine did not do that to me ... Thank God! Mine Showed me that I'm not the only one that Hurts, and How I Carry myself can Hurt and Harm others, so there for I do my Best to Add Compassion in my Life, on a Daily basis, and Just STOP... THINK.... & HALT....Tho they all sound the Same, They are Truly all Different to me... But Help me so Much...

Me Living the Upbringing that was laid before me, the struggles I over came with Verbal abuse, Alcohol Abuse, Drug Abuse, and Neglect,  I can now Hold my Head high and Know that I don't have to Bitter to get what I want out of life, I don't have to Kiss someones Butt to satisfy others to make myself happy... That is Almost a FREEING for me... I know longer have to Jump under the Bus to Feel Loved & Accepted...

Funny how Growing up with an Alcoholic/Addict Father ... I Feel .... Sadly is one of the best things that could have happened to me... I can say that now, I couldn't just over 2 short years ago... I say this Only because, had I not Seen My Father Die because of this disease... I would not have found Al-Anon and the beautiful people that live in these walls, I would not have quit drinking, and doing the things I was, and I would most likely be a Cute-r Version of My Father and Just as Screwed up!

Yeah I wish something could have been different, the bitterness, and hatred that came after the divorce between my parents, but after about 10 years they did call a truce. ...

I have learned thru this program that it is EASY to be Bitter because everything in life will try and drag you down, but being Happy I have to Work at... And I Do so Everyday with the Help, Love & Support of those here & at my F2F Group, and My Al-Anon/ACOA Lit... I could have a Most Loving, Respectful bunch of People in my Life... So I am Forever Grateful for my AFather Who Lead me to ALL of You! My Glass will Remain Half Full Regardless of those Sitting on their Soap Box trying to Screw with my life and My Family and Belittle me to make them Seem Tall! Some day their Soap box will Crumble and I will still be sitting here with my glass 1/2 Full and their Bottom/Reality will hit when Their HP See's Fit, Not When I See fit...

I have been Used and Tossed aside more times then not, and now that I have a Program that allows me to set Boundarys and Accept that I too have the RIGHT to be Happy... None of that Matters anymore, because I get up every morning knowing that I did the Best I Could to Help them,, I did the Best I Could to be there for them when they needed, and NOW... Its time to do the Same exact thing for Myself, and if their Selfish, Self Righteousness is all they have, that is Know longer My Problem, and I  truly wish them Happiness, just no Longer at my Expense ... I Owe Me what I Offered to Others For Years... And I am Very Grateful for all of you that has proven that to me Over & Over again with ALL of your ESH, Love, Support, Encouragement, and sometimes even a Nice Good PUSH!

So thanks to all of you  for Helping me Grow In Happiness, and allowing me to Let Go of the Sickness I held on to for so Long... And giving me a Chance to Really Live... Happy, Joyous & Free

Love, Hugs & Prayers to you all!!!