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wife has been sober for four months, kids are starting to trust her and they have been so happy having her. She drank at the neighborhood 4th of July party, she was visibly intoxicated. I had to send her home. I haven't and am not going to tell the kids, but they might figure it out. Program is so much easier when I don't have to face active drinking. She said on her way out that she should still have the kids for her night tomorrow, I just said we'd talk about it tomorrow. I'm really scared, last time she relapsed she tried to hurt herself. I'm just praying it's a slip and she'll call her sponsor. I really want to rescue right now. I'm praying really hard, first my nephew, now my wife.
Good for you for sticking to your program and keeping your hands off as best as you can. You may feel the need to rescue however you are not acting on it. Keep taking care of you.
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I can greatly relate to you right now and good job at taking care of you! Keep working your program and taking care of your kids! It sounds like you are doing a great job!
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God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
If your wife has truly been 'sober' (i.e. following a program of recovery) for four months, then hopefully she has a "relapse plan" and will take the necessary steps..... for her. In my experience, I found that I needed the same.... I went to a family counselling session at my ex-AW's (first) treatment center, and I wrote up a plan for what I would do, should there be a relapse (and there was). This may be something you want to look into, possibly with the aid of an addictions counsellor....
Take care
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
It is always sad to watch your loved on relapse and I do hope she has a relapse plan. My A is my son who also got some good sober time under his belt and then let it slip away. he didn't follow his relapse plan but we followed ours and reminded him he would have to leave our home and find other living arragements. Which he did. And he did ok initally then lost his job ( he is on probation btw ) and used that excuse to keep getting high. He swore he was trying and initally we enabled a bit by giving him money for transportaion and drug testing but as he spiraled downward we went back to our relapse plan and cut off the money...as hard as that was. Of course then he couldnt test or get to couseling etc so he was taken back into custody. He just showed us he wasn't truly ready for recovery and all the wishing in the world isn't going to change that. What he will do when released from jail I have no clue. He has no where to go, no job, lost most of his friends etc. But I am working on not projecting any senerio. Just workin my program and tryin to stay busy I hope you keep workin your program you and your kids are worth it Blessings
