The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I thought my perception of what I thought of people and what they thought of me was correct, I hadn't learnt that feelings arn't facts, and that when I could learn to percieve things in an healthy way, I could see things with new eyes.
As I am working with this new boundary with our son, my perception of what the outcome will be is changing, my old perception shut out all other just as likely positive outcomes and I would fall back into negative thinking and become the source of my own misery.
There was alot of anxiety connected to my perception pre-alanon, and I have to hold my hands up and say that I instigated created drama due to my very own distorted perceptions and actions.
Example hubby has sometimes natural grumpy face, Katys asks whats wrong? hubby says nothing, Katy says there is tell me, hubby says nothing, Katy persists is it me? Hubby says no, Katy says? it is me, isn't it? Hubby starts to get mad and will say? yes it is you, Katy thinks ermmmmm thought so!
And now I am busying myself and won't try and assess hubbies mood by what I see, as I get more confident in who I am, it matters less, good days are starting to happen regardless and inspite of me, yippeeeeeeeeeee!
I'm right there with hotrod, love the growth and can hear your happiness in what you are writing. :) The good days for ourselves make it all worth while. :)
P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Katy, I thought I would share this little joke I heard a few months ago on perception. We all need a little laugh or two in recovery.
Matter of Perception:
Newcomer: "My conscience finally brought me to the Program." Old-timer: "How so?" Newcomer: " I kept seeing this eyeball staring at me from the bottom of the glass! I'm sure it was my conscience." Old-timer: "Probably an olive. But never mind---whatever works!"
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
