The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've been reading the board for about a month, and feel like it's time for me to join in on the conversations.
I first want to say that I appreciate that this board and it's members are here any time day or night that I need some ESH. It's really been a great resource for me, and that's why I want to try and become more involved / connected.
I've been going to F2F Al-Anon meetings (3/week) for about 2 months and I've been in therapy (1 session/week) for about 6 months.
I know my story is the same as everyone's, the specifics and the people involved may be different, but at it's root, it's the same.
I'm married to what I believe is my soul mate. We've been together for 26 years, but only married for 4 years. We have a wonderful son who's leaving for college (full scholarship at a top school) in September. I run my own successful business and we live in a nice home and don't really struggle financially.
Sounds like the ideal life, but obviously there's a problem.
My A is in the midst of a complete meltdown that's been recurring every few months for the last 2 years. Each time it gets a little worse, and I'm finally at the point where I'm realizing that I have to shift the focus to myself and my serenity.
There's a lot to the story (just like everyone elses), but I don't want to take up a ton of anyone's time with the gory details.
I just wanted to say hello and thank you to the members of this board for the help that it has been providing me over the last few months.
so glad to hear you are attending face2 face meetings and have been accessing this board. this disease is one of the hardest things i have had to deal with, you must be experiencing a lot of sadness watching your husbands disease progress. We did not cause it we can not control or fix it all we can do is learn how to deal with it in al anon. No one will giv you advice I just hope you receive the love and support I have. My partner is in AA today and trying hard to stay sober there is hope. Hand your hubby over to Hp and ask him to guide you to what you need to do on your journey
take good acre of yourself at this difficult time you are not alone
Please don't feel that your story is going to take up other people's time. We are all here for help and to help each other. Everyone here has been in your situation or something similar to one degree or another.
I do understand, of course, that some things feel very personal and it takes a while to be able to talk about them (if at all). Some of us are also shy or are not used to easily disclosing.
Whatever, it is O.K. If and when you want to share, just know that it will not be a "burden" to us.
I was so happy to read that you are attending meetings. I've only attending for a little over 3 months, but I see a significant difference in me already, especially with the guilt. For me, meetings are so much more powerful than any of my private sessions with a psychologist. I wish I had begun attending meetings lon ago.
Congratulations on your child's scholorship. Since you need Al-Anon, I'm so happy for you that you've found this board.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
Thanks for posting and don't worry about wasting out time with your details, we are here to help each other by sharing our stories. I believe we all have value in each of our shares to help someone else that can relate to us. Thanks for reaching out and sharing with us!
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God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
As others have done so, I am so glad you are here. Face to face meetings and working with a sponsor really is one of the magical parts of the program. I am so glad you are going to meetings and finding value in them. Keep coming back and please do share. This is a wonderful forum to reach out to.
Lifewon'twait... Welcome here! We love to hear how the real time face to face meetings work for others, and when you feel like sharing more of your story, we love to hear those too. It helps me to hear what others are going through and doing to make it work. I currently live with an active alcholic (my boyfriend) and I am working on me in Alanon. Glad you are here! Keep coming, it works when we work it!
__________________
-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
Thanks for the welcome everyone. I'm truely grateful that this board is here.
Going through some very tough times right now and this board is a great suplement to my therapy and F2F meetings.
I'll share a little bit of what's happening right now.
My AW is currently in full relapse. Drinking more and faster than she has in the past.
She's flip floping between wanting to go into re-hab / not wanting to go. Because she's dual diagnosed and on medicare, her options are pretty limited as to what facilities she can go to. Basically the facilities that she's found are not as nice / comfortable as what she had hoped.
I'm working my program as best I can so that I can take care of myself, my son, and her (without being controlling). I'm also doing my best to let her make these decisions (re-hab / no re-hab) for herself, but it's so hard watching the woman that I love treat herself so badly.
The liquor was in full control last night and it said some very hurtful / hateful things. I know they weren't 100% true, but there was just enough truth to them and said in such a mean spirited way that it was really painful.
I just need to keep coming here, working my program, going to meetings, and Let Go / Let God.
Keep reaching out the stong men here on the board. I have seen some similar experiences shared amongst the guys here regarding their wives and this disease.
This place is a Godsend. I too have a spouse that struggles with their drinking. I totally get where you are right now.
Please stick around and reach out. This place really is awesome if you are up all night. Someone always answers your post.
I am so glad you are here. Thanks for sharing. You are helping so many others with your posts.
