The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
"I came to Al-Anon confused about what was and was not my responsibility. Today, after lots of Step work, I believe I am responsible for the following:
to be loyal to my values to please myself first to rid myself of anger and resentment to express my ideas and feelings instead of stuffing them to attend Al-Anon meetings and keep in touch with friends in the fellowship to be realistic in my expectations to make healthy choices to be grateful for my blessings
I also have certain responsibilities to others:
to extend a welcome to newcomers to be of service to recognize that others have a right to live their own lives to listen, not just with my ears, but also with my heart to share my joy as well as my sorrow" (from Courage to Change, One Day at a Time in Al-Anon II, page 85).
Here is what I am working on: Living fully, so that I can fully live. Practicing my spirituality, because if I do, I am better able to live with my bf no matter if he drinks or not. There is something at the beginning of the alanon meetings that says, if I don't practice my spirituality, that living with an alcoholic is too difficult for most of us. I want to turn that around and say, if I do practice my spirituality, and use my alanon tools, living with an alcoholic is not so hard. I am not in any danger, my bf is not abusive in any way.
So when I work on me, focus on me, do what I want to do, I feel better and things get better around me! This past weekend was wonderful. I had a great day Saturday, we all went to a butterfly pavilion and he never drank all day. I did what I wanted to do, I took some great photos there of my kids and we smiled all afternoon. He of course didn't drink Sunday, I was able to go do something with a friend of mine while he watched my younger son. It was fantastic to be out doing for me! And when I got home, he showered me with hugs and kisses and we laughed about his day with my son.
When my attitude changes it helps EVERYTHING around me. I am responsible for that ;)
I have not yet found a sponsor or worked the steps, but I am heading in that direction! This Wednesday is my meeting again, I am so happy to be going :)
Thanks all...I just wanted to post some sunshine...
__________________
-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
I am working on it...I had to call a fellow alanonic last night after bf decided to have a few drinks. But you know what, it helped me to call her and she was happy I called because she had missed her usual meeting and said that I helped her too! It works when we work it
__________________
-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
Great share! To see the other side of the coin, one of the breakthroughs in my recovery was when I was able to say, "I'm NOT responsible!"
- for other people's feelings - for other people's behavior - for other people's choices - etc., etc.
One of the great blessings of the program - one of the paths to serenity - is in learning what belongs to whom. In owning what is mine and allowing others to own what is theirs.
