I just wanted to stop by and Thank each and everyone one of you here for the guidance, ESH, love and support you have shown me in the past 3/1-4 yrs since I found this board.  I've always been treated with love, compassion and understanding.  The knowledge and wisdom I've found here has helped me to grow and find happiness I never thought imaginable.  For that and this board I will ALWAYS be grateful.

That bein said, it saddens me that I have to say goodbye to MIP.  I feel that I don't have the freedoms I once had here, or I should say the confidentiality to express my true heart felt feelings and for my recovery to continue to grow I need to be able to do that without fear of reprocussions or stress.  I need more confidentiality than I feel I can have here. 

I can truly say when I came here I was a wreck, an emotional mess, so confused and hurt by the disease of alcoholism and my reactions to it, my heart was broken and I was suffering from depression.  And thanks to all of you....I can now truly say, even with my health worse than ever, I feel more blessed more grateful and happier than I've been in five years. My life is full, amazing and I count each day my blessings.

I've found love again, and with the help of letting go and changing my personal life and setting boundaries, I'm in a position to love again and be loved back... and in order to do that I'm going to be relocating in August, to FLA! He asked me to marry him when my son was nine moths, and I woundnt...I needed to know in my heaart that I wasn't settling and after 14 yrs I think I've proven that I could. He asked me to marry him again 14 years laters and said yes.  I'm going to go see the best Dr's and get the hep I need from them, I'll also be able to quit my ft job and work pt, if I choose to work at all...I'll be living a much more relaxed life with a man I've loved since I was 25 yrs old.  The hardest part will be moving my son so far away from him grandma and friends, and missing my mom. In the beginning as long as my health holds up, I'll be able to fly home every 6-8 weeks so, and with my family or origin helping out with my mother, I can finally move forward in my life.....I'm so excited and so blessed.

My mom I'll miss worse than anything, she has given me the courage to be myself, and I am her daughter.....negatives at times, scared, but compassionate and loving.  Independant at times but loving and kind. She taught me to stand on my own, not to settle for anything less than what I deserve and that I can do anything on my own that I put my mind too.  I spent the entire day Suday with my mom,  laughing and enjoying her company.  Working in her garden while my son weed whacked and enjoyed himself. We cut up, clowened aournd and she sat and gave directions on "what goes where".  She's always loved her yard and rose garden and you could tell she was really grateful for our time together.  I plan of spend as much time with her before I go, but I know in my heart she'll be ok she has her own HP and it's my time to have my life.  I think she'll understand and be happy for me....

This place has saved my life, you people have held me when I couldnt stand alone and I will never forget the help I've recieved here.  I still plan to go to my f2f meetings here before we move and have already found some close to my new home my husband and I will share.  I'll never walk away from my progrram again and KNOW that my HP wil see me through this exciting time.

Again thank each and everyone of you, and especially you Trish....you gave me hope when I couldn't see any, a book that change the course of my life forever and compassion..This board is as amazing and I am soo very grateful for the new life you all have given me....Thank you all and God bless each and everyone one of you in your recovery....

Finally free to be me

Shelly

ps-for anyone wishing to keeo in touch...please pm me for my personal contact information.