The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This weekend my bf was away at a program for getting a DUI a year ago. It was so nice to hear from him, he was sober the whole time. We talked, but I also did a lot for me. I kept my focus on me and my kids. We laughed a lot and had some quiet time too. I spent some time at a friend's with her kids too, we made a big supper together Saturday night and ate a ton of food. I went to the library and got a new alanon book I had never seen "In all our affairs". That is really interesting. One funny thing I noticed is that I didn't text or call him first at all. I was so busy with myself that I didn't even think about it. He would text every now and then on a break and tell me he loved me or this or that, and then would call every few hours to say hi and such...I also felt really loved by my hp and closer than I have been ever. That HP loves me no matter what is so nice...
I put some thought into how I have never actually "known" what I like. So I started a list of things I like. Just anything, from "hot chocolate to sunflowers to warmth"...I also started a dislike list...you can imagine one of the things on there can't you? Yes, drinking or people getting drunk. So I told my bf about me making these lists and he said "wow, thats great, I am glad you are doing this for yourself" :) I realized I can spend time with myself without thinking about him. And tonight is an open Alanon meeting, I hope to get to...I told him I was going tonight and he asked if he could go too.
One other thing, I asked the kid's sensei about starting Karate in July, and told him I didn't have the money to pay. Its through the town's recreation program. He said he would certainly look into anything he can do to make sure I can train! I am so excited about this! The only thing is, the night I was going to a meeting is one of the nights that karate is. However I feel that going to karate will only help me heal, so its a good step and I can get to a few other meetings on other days...
I feel good. I am so glad I found alanon and that it found me...
__________________
-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
Sounds really positive, and way to go... so nice to see the positives...
One small word of caution - you say he wants to go to an open Al-Anon meeting with you.... if this is a one-time thing, then maybe it's great.... if he is wanting to go to Al-Anon, rather than AA, it is not.... a wise oldtimer once told me that newbie A's often want to go to Al-Anon, rather than AA, so they can focus on US and what we need/should be doing, rather than doing the tougher work on themselves....
Take care
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
Ahh yes Tom, I hear you. Not sure what his thoughts were regarding this? Maybe that he had been at meetings all weekend and wanted to see what my meeting is like? I don't know. For sure, one is enough though :) Maybe he will be a double winner someday...who knows. I go to one open AA meeting on Friday's because there are like NO Alanon meetings here that I can get to...so maybe that is his thought, to go with me to one of mine? Who knows. I will listen to your words of wisdom in this though :) Thanks!
__________________
-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
I think it is awesome that you are discovering yourself. I see the actions in your posts specifically the words you use that demonstrate you are getting stronger.
Also, quickly, for me I would not want my loved one that brought me to Alanon to be in the same meeting. Perhaps one or two times, maybe. I myself want a safe place to share which is part of the H.O.W. of the 12 step program. Honesty, Open mindedness, and Willing.
