The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Many my remember and know my story with my aH. Separated for 2 and a half years. We have a young son together. The marriage and the separation have included a miriad of trials and tribulations related to the chaos of alcoholism. I finally decided to divorce him in December and had divorce papers drawn up, for him to be served in January. I was moving on from him and what I had experienced with him. I was creating a new life for myself. I fully and totally gave up, let go and put my aH in the hands of HP, wishing him all the best, and having nothing to do with what that would look like.
Then, something happened. My aH got sober. I mean, really sober. He not only quit drinking, but he entered into a rehab program and he got completely honest, completely sober. At first, I couldn't have cared less. I was happy for him, and what that may mean for our son, but personally and romantically, I couldn't have been more disinterested. The anger, defensiveness, the bitterness, the WALL I had built was not about to let anything to do with aH affect me anymore.
It has been 3 months since aH has been sober and though he is not perfect, nor am I, we have been given a miracle, which is a chance to reconnect. I couldn't be happier that I now have something to work with here. I never wanted to divorce my aH, but I felt that for me, it was my only option for moving forward. Now, his sobriety gives me a new option~one I'm happy to choose.
It's not often that we hear "good news" stories here and quite honestly whenever I've read them, i've often had a shadow of a doubt about them. When you have so much pain, anger and difficulty dealing with an A, its hard to believe it could ever change. But, I can speak firsthand that Miracles do Happen.
My sponsor always told me God is still in the miracle business. I was at rock bottom like you were. I had to go to a deep level of surrender and give up my old ideas before the miracle occurred in my life and my families life. Thanks for sharing. It gives many people hope.
Thank you Rora, I love the outcome of your journey so far and like to hear a happy share. Thanks for the uplift to my day of how things can work when you are working the steps!
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God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
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