The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
So i've started going to meetings and I know who I want to ask to be my sponsor. We have talked alot, and I know she's the one. She has been so awesome to me since I've met her, calling me every day, coming with me to meetings, and saying she will be there for me.
We have a date on Monday to get coffee and talk. Am I supposed to formally ask her "will you sponsor me?" Is that what I am supposed to do at this point? I'm so new to this I don't know if I am supposed to ask her directly to make it official.
Thanks!
~Aimee
-- Edited by Aimee on Friday 22nd of April 2011 02:09:44 PM
I realized early on that I needed a sponsor. She had been through what I was going through. I asked her straight up if she would be my sponsor. It has been a great relationship for four years. I ask her now and then if she still wants to be my sponsor and she says yes.
Yeppers....Asking, reaching out for help is our part of the program. Taking responsiblility for our own recovery. "I'd like you to be my sponsor. Will you agree with that?" Then listen. Listening is what I did with all of my sponsors. You go Girl...good luck. (((((Aimee)))))
How wonderful for you to be meeting a recovery friend for coffee! It was at least a year in the program before I could do that. I always sat in the back in meetings, didn't share for probably 8 months, and ran out the door right after the meeting ended. I didn't have a sponsor for a year because I was too shy/anxious about asking someone, for whatever reason!
My experience with asking someone to be my sponsor is that if they say no, it was the best thing for a me. You really want someone that can give you the time you need when you first get started. I asked five different people and got no for an answer which is to say they were being honest with themselves in not being able to give me what I really needed to get started. Finally I summoned the courage to asked my current sponsor to be a temporary sponsor. She said yes and has been my temporary sponsor for six years now.
One last suggestion. There is a pamphlet on sponsorship available in alanon meetings. I think you should pick it up and check it out. It outlines what a sponsor is, what they do. It may not be a lifetime commitment. This program is all about you. You can change sponsors at any time if it does not work out for you.
