Hi everyone, just wanted to share something that I feel lends intself to the ODAT philosophy...which I think I'm doing better at embracing or practicing.

Yesterday was one of the worst days I've had in a long time. Alarm clock didn't go off in the morning, I was exhausted as my dog was really sick the night before so I was up on and off all night. I was SO tired. I slipped on ice and twisted my ankle running to the car, was late for work, work day was awful riddled with sudded deadlines so I was working at intense speeds with adrenaline coursing through my body and heart beating out of my chest. AH called me at lunch from rehab and he was having a bad day too, so combine that with my bad day, and let's just say you couldn't even call our phone call a conversation as we didn't communicate well at all. I was so frustrated.

I stayed late at work then called my daughter (who was at my parents after school) to tell her when I'd pick her up - then my mom got on the phone and dropped on me that we are having dad's bday festivites that night and originally this was supposed to happen in a week's time. My anxiety went through the roof (I'm really starting to think I need some anti anxiety meds) because I'm working on a side project and promised the client a deliverable that next morning. So, I had plans to work on that in the evening and of couse, a night dedicated to birthday dinner and cake and presents scews all my plans.  I explained this to my mom who told me my dad would understand if I skipped dinner and just showed up for cake or 10 mintues then went home. I of course can't even stomach doing that as I'd be riddle with guilt for not being there for dad's bday - we are close and so the thought of me stopping by for 10 minutes and leaving made me feel so horrible and so anxious I couldn't even put it into words. I attempted to explain to mom how this made me feel, of course she didn't get it, I sat there on the phone silent then stuttering, I became frozen with, I dunno how to descibe it, crippling anxiety maybe? I couldn't talk. Finaly I just let my mom go. I sat in my office and starred at the phone unable to move then started bawling. I just completely broke down and could not stop sobbing and almost hyperventilating.

My boss (whos knows my situation and is very supportive) was the only one left in the office and heard me break down - she called me into her office and was all nice so of course it made me break down even more, wouldn't have guessed that was possible.

Got home, sister put me on the spot in front of my daugher, mom joined in, blah blah....so I erupted in frustration, then broke down in tears. My dad didn't say anything that entire time, then he just walked up and hugged me. It was the most powerful gesture and the most needed hug I've ever recieved and I'm tearing up right now just thinking about how much I appreciated it and him. Well, this hug shut up my mom and sister from trying to come up with creative ways that would allow me to not have to go home and let my dog out, walk him, not have to pick up something at the mall that was ready for me, not have to work on my side project, not have to do all the things I had to do....like I can't think on my own. Eventually, they came up and hugged me too.
I ended up going home, tending to my dog, did some stuff, then went for my dad's bday thing which turned into just cake and we are doing dinner next week. Got home and staying up till 3 in the morning working...so I only slept for 4 hours last night but.......

Today was fantastic. No traffic in the morning on the way to work (which was eerily odd), fantastic day at work, got a project approved that I worked really hard on and impressed the folks at my presentation meeting, met AH at lunch and drove him back to rehab, we just enjoyed eachother, chatted, it was nice. Accomplished stuff I wanted to at work, won a free coffee, a book I ordered came in the mail, hung out with my daughter all night and we bought these bootie things for our dog's paws (so that I can take my dog to my parents house now cause before my mom didn't want him scratching her new hardwood floors).

I have a huge dog, so I strattled him while putting his boots on while my daughter fed him treats while the video camera was recording..... It said on the dog bootie box that "your dog may dance when he walks for the first time" so, I wanted this on tape. Well, the box didn't lie and what followed was one of the most hilarious (and cutest) and pure blissfull moments of my life. Our dog got up and jumped and yes, he totally 'danced' while giving me this "what the hell did you put on me" look. Me and my daughter were laughing so hard we were crying....my daughter had to pass me the camera cause she had to run to the bathroom...and she didn't make it, she peed her pants from laughing so hard...so we laughed harder. She had a shower....then we played with our dog and laughed for another 20 minutes. We were both just gasping for breath and crying from laughing so hard. It was a fantastic evening.

Oh, and after a while, our dog didn't seem to really notice his new boots but it was still funny looking at him with boots on.

So, I'm thinking that maybe my HP gave me these extreme days, back to back, to further teach me how to not get so hung up on the bad and to truly appreciate the good, and take it one day at a time cause you never know how wonderful tommorrow can be:)

Danielle

-- Edited by danielle0516 on Friday 18th of March 2011 12:54:15 AM

-- Edited by danielle0516 on Friday 18th of March 2011 12:58:36 AM