The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi everyone. What a day. My husband stayed out most of the night. Which was fine but he woke up this morning being a brat. He demanded I pay half the bills. I got student loan money so he knows I have money in the bank. He threatened to slash my tires and disable my car. Actually my car still isn't fixed from yesterday. And he won't give me the parts. Over and over again. What a mistake the last ten years have been. I took his car and left for a while. I hate this. Of course he drinks because he's miserable being with me. Ouch. I. Wish I could leave. I. ant stand this. How can he be so mean ? I do my fair share and some of his. He just hates me.
Someday you will realize that it's not "you" he hates, but that he hates himself. People with self-hate, can be terribly viscious to those around them, especially to those whom they know love them.
This has been my experience and I'm certain others on this board will tell you the same.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
I agree with Gail. I will add that when they see us getting better, more healthy, they see they all losing control and will do or try anything in their power to maintain status quo.
You need to keep going to your meetings and taking care of you. If you were given a phone list at your first meeting don't hesitate to use it to call and talk with another member. There names are on the list for that very reason.
The alcoholic treats us the way they feel about them selves plain and simple and they lash out at those of us who love them , only thing i would suggest is if he slashes your tires or disables your vehicle in anyway that is detremental to your saftey call the police and let them handle it . Go to your meetings and get the focus back on yourself he is gonna do what hes gonna do . take care of you for a change .
