The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This is my first time posting here..I don't really know where to begin ..all i know is that i need alanon & acoa because my life is unmanageable and has been for a very long time. Today after the alanon mtg here i feel hopeful again that i can get better. I never looked at self-pity like an addiction until i started reading this book, but it is I can see that This book tells me that I should not feed the self-pity by giving into it and to find ways to combat it.
I have been around alcoholism most of my life and became very codependent and needy and insecure about myself over the yrs. I am a very broken person inside but i do want to be a whole person some day. How do start working step 1 on the message boards?
Aloha New and welcome. Good you're already attending face to face Al-Anon meetings and the very best, for me, way to work the steps are inside the meeting rooms and with a sponsor who has the experience. On the boards you will get a lot of feedback from personal experiences on working the steps and warm, face to face was best for me other wise I was left trying to figure it out for myself and that extended the journey.
For me step one came in two sections. I got the second one later than the first. I rationalized that alcohol sat in a bottle and didn't do anything and was under a cap and the like so that seemed like a no brainer; that my life had become unmanageable was a longer journey because I didn't know about that stuff and had not inventoried my life or anything or even knew how it was supposed to be going. I had totally given my life and my happiness over to the alcoholics in my life and I knew their lives were screwed up and had not the awareness of the skill or example of looking back at my own. I had to accept that most of the time I felt crazy and accept that as a sign of unmanagability. I didn't know for sure and didn't know that I didn't know so I had a lot of learning to do and looking and listening and then practice.
Welcome to the board. You have lots of ESH and support available for you here. Stick around and join us. ((((hugs))))
Yes, I had a lot of that going on , self pity, glad you are recognizing it so soon. That said it still doesnt diminish the affects that this disease can do to us, even on our best days.
We really are never done working the steps, each time we do we find another dimension of ourselves. I will say that if you can concentrate on Step #1, that will help you enormously. Its a very important step. Reading it and actually understanding it and putting it into action takes time. "We admitted we are powerless over alcohol-that our lives had become unmanageable."
I found that the benefit of having a sponsor made all the difference in my recovery. This disease is too powerful to go it alone. We need all the help we can get.
Dear Terri Welcome I am so glad you found alanon Working the Steps is huge and can be done when you are ready I found working the "Slogans" were a short cut to woring the Steps
I practiced the slogan: Let Go of (anger, self pity, sadness,) and Let God-- Focus on yourserf This Enabled me to see who I was and how my mind was always looking to blame others or gossip I could not focus on my self Practice , practice pratice took care of that.
Examine your motives was a true short cut to a 4th step
I attended a meeting a day for over 2 years and aftere using the slogans and attending the meetings I was ready to work the steps and they made sense
