AH and I had a very long talk today about a lot of things.  Insecurities from our past, fears, anxieties about the future, and of course about drinking.  It was very heartfelt and tearful on both ends.  At the end of the conversation he says to me, "I was dreading how you were going to treat me after my display on Saturday.  I thought you were just going to lay into me, etc..."  So, he said he was very surprised when I just 'talked' to him.  If you remember one of my last posts I made note that  I did not throw out any accusations, I did not harass him about it, nor did I go around blaming.  I stayed calm.  I took care of ME!  So, he noticed!  YAY!  We obviously have a long way to go but letting go of his problem really did make me more free and he and I were able to have a much more respectful conversation because of it.  Thank you to all those who share their wisdom here!