The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My A brother got out of jail last Wednesday. The judge said if he came back for any alchohol related offense he was facing 5 yrs in the big-boy jail.
I drove him around so he could find a place to live. Every place that he liked, did a background check, but he got approval from his number one choice, and we moved his stuff in Tuesday evening. It took us one week, but we finally got it done. He did great while he was with me. He went to meetings every night.
I just got off the phone with him, and it sounded like he had been drinking. I asked if he was going to a meeting tonight, and he said he was too tired, and was going tomorrow night. I didn't say anything to him about how he sounded, and just said I'd talk to him later. i don't know if he was drinking, but it sure sounded like he had. Not much, but one is too many.
In the past, it would have stressed me out. It didn't bother me at all, because i have detached myself from his problems. Now I have to focus on me, and not get caught up in it by thinking about it constantly.
How old is your brother. Im surprised the judge didnt offer him a sober living home.
You might suggest it to your brother and see what he says.
My best friends son went into sober living and it was the best thing for him. He was there a year and also they have to want to. He did come out sober and has stayed sober , this has been for a good 8 years.
Yes we do have to detach from the alcoholic, otherwise our lives are adversely affected.
After many years, my XAH decided to go to sober living, he has been sober for 3 weeks for the first time in his life. I guess the test will be when he comes out, but right now he is working a program and staying sober.
All we can do is work our program, sounds like your doing a good job at that.
Luv, Bettina
-- Edited by Bettina on Thursday 20th of January 2011 06:18:33 PM
Hope you get to a meeting where you can allow us to love you too ((((hugs)))) till you come to love yourself. Loving an alcoholic is exhausting and love is never enough.
