heroin addiction - Al-Anon Family Group

nycwolf · Newbie

heroin addiction

sunflowergirl · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome here NYCWolf... I can relate totally to your post. My bf has had bouts with this same thing and with alcohol as well. I was told when he was in rehab that there is no drug that is greater than another. It is the disease that is the same in all of us. We are addicted to them, they are addicted to a substance. I feel your pain of the overdose. I have seen this too at one point. It is true, there is nothing we can do for THEM. We can only do for ourselves. I am right in the thick of it right now. I can tell you there are those here, the old timers who have either stayed in the relationship and had serenity no matter what, or left, or their partner got better. Right now I am staying. I haven't been able to make the major decision of leaving. My bf relapsed Friday night with alcohol, but has stayed off of heroin/opiates for a week. He wants to be sober, and he is not working a program, so he is struggling with it. I am working on me here in this program. Alanon works when we work it. I don't feel as if you need to find Naranon ( you can if you want to), I feel that Alanon is just fine, its all addiction as you say. The other thing that helped me was the book The New Codependency. I am codependent and an adult child of dysfunction. So I am learning slowly but surely to focus on me. This is very hard. When I focus on me, I see and feel my pain from my past. It hurts and that is why I have such a hard time doing it. That is why I have spent my life focused on EVERYONE else. So learning to focus on me and accept me is where I am at.
I am learning about the steps, the tools, the slogans. I have a sponsor. I get on this board as much as I can. I keep myself out of my depression almost all the time now. You can find happiness and serenity here and in the face to face meetings of alanon and naranon. Another few books that helped: Courage to Change, Language of letting go and the book Getting Them Sober.
Welcome here, keep coming back, it works when we work it. Just for today, I can make it through with the help of my higher power, whom I am learning is there for me, no matter what... Take care of you!

nycwolf · Newbie

Hi sunflowergirl

Thanks so much for your words of strength and kindness. I, too, come from an alcoholic family...my parents are not alcoholics...but THEIR parents were...so I guess the term for my folks is "al-anonics"...so MY behavior has been formed in part by being raised in an "al-anonic" household. I seem to gravitate towards men I think I can "fix". I could go on and on!

Anyway, I will look for the literature you recommended and thank you again for your kind words...they put my mind a bit more at ease and for that I am grateful.

Thanks!!

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

hi and welcome.

My ex addict husband, went to Viet Nam, came back a heroin addict.

He was hooked for years, then quit cold turkey, was off for thirty years.

Then sadly after a brain tumor surgery started it and anything he could get his hands on.

He too O.D.ed ended up in ER twice, had to be zapped back. His brother was also a heroin addict. He went on the methadone program and thrived.

Sadly I lost him to cirrosis a few years back.

But the ex addict H, and from others, if they OD many times it was NOT an accident. Many are so tired of it, they know it is an ez way to go.

Sadly we can do zero. What we have to do is put it in HP's hands and deal with whatever happens. I mean if they OD and we are there. If we choose to live with them.

Both times mine was at his mommies after I asked him to leave our home.

Heroin also can be cut with some very dangerous chemicals. If bought from the wrong people they can be shooting death.

If you guys talk frankly has he explored methadone?

What is more important is to work on you. Addiction is addiction you are correct. It is not our problem in a way that we can control any of it.

Mine was maintaining on it for awhile. I had NO idea he was on it! He was finally himself. Pretty sad eh?

I am glad you are here. We do care very much. What some people would do is call 911 to allow them to experience the consequences of the behavior.

hugs, love,deb

nycwolf · Newbie

Thanks, Deb

Yes, he has explored methadone...which helps with the withdrawl from heroin but creates a whole other addiction and getting off methadone is almost as hard and takes twice as long as heroin. And methadone is very hard to get on the street.

He has no health insurance so there's no legal way for him to get anything that might be helpful.

He gets Suboxone and Subutex from "friends" on occasion...and it helps a little...but he just uses them on days that he doesn't have any money to get dope...he doesn't use them to try and kick.

But now he's telling me that starting tomorrow he's going to try and kick (again) with Suboxone and Valium...which we have. I'm hopeful. I have to be.

Thanks for your support!

Side note: I downloaded Bob Marley's "Three Little Birds" last night and the strength that this one song has given me is astounding. I highly recommend to all!!

xx

sunflowergirl · ~*Service Worker*~

NYC WOLF... I just wanted to tell you I am in that same cycle with my bf, the suboxone and subutex seemed to help for a week (that he got on the street, no insurance so cheapest way to get it...) he was so proud of himself for not doing H for a week. That ended yesterday... There are not Meth programs in our area. Its so hard. I will go check out that song, I have heard it many times, maybe I need to hear it now :)

faith84 · Veteran Member

I also have been through, and am going through something similar, except, despite my bf being on heroin for a decade, somehow he still hasn't overdosed. He snorts it and doesn't inject it, not that it matters how it's done. His experience with Suboxone started off with good intentions but eventually he just started selling or trading them to buy dope. It's always a vicious cycle. For years I have tried to understand his addiction and only ended up losing myself in the process.
The only advice I know to give is that they have to want it. And nothing you can do or say wll make much of a difference to them, it is their battle not ours. We have to stay strong and learn to cope what is happening around us. Make a decision whether or not this is something we want to put up with or not, and then take the steps to help ourselves and hope that they follow suit.
I hope this helps. I know this is such a terrible and heart wrenching thing to go through and we are all putting up a good fight.

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