The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
1. We admitted that we were powerless over seriousness -- that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that only by lightening up could we achieve a state of non-seriousness.
3. Made a decision to turn our constant self-criticism over to our sense of humor and learn to "lovingly and wholeheartedly" laugh at ourselves.
4. Decided to give ourselves a break once in a while, instead of constantly doing searching and fearless moral inventories of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being that our wrongs were often in our heads.
6. Were entirely ready to accept that our characters were as good as anybody else's and possibly better than most.
7. Quit harping on our shortcomings.
8. Made of list of all persons we thought we had harmed and saw that they'd forgotten all the crap we'd blown out of proportion.
9. Quit making amends for breathing air and taking up a few square feet of the planet's surface.
10. Resigned ourselves to the fact we were going to criticize ourselves at times, but would try to stick to our guns when we knew we were right.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to calm down and realize we're not responsible for everything.
12. Having experienced immense relief from these steps, we would try to carry this message to other over-serious people and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.
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The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. ----- Samuel Johnson
We get so mired in the A's sickness we forget we are not the ones who are sick.
Even when we have a strong recovery program going it is horrible hard to be sitting there in your home with someone who never laughs, smiles or talks. Gads I do not miss it any tiny bit.
Thanks for sharing this. hugs,debilyn
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Putting HP first, always <(*@*)>
"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."
My gripe with this is that I can't laugh off everything....and trying to discern is tough. I'm pretty good about not taking certain things too seriously but other things seems tough to let go...I've been told to, but unless I can be shown why it's not important I can't let go and don't want to. Case in point. The Santa situation at my house that i've posted about (wife keeps telling daughter there is no santa). On the one hand it's not an "abuse" issue. I shouldn't stay up nights worrying about the effect on my daughter's psych because it's not that big. That said its grossly unfair to my daughter ( I realize this may not be the best example but I'm trying to make a point). She should be allowed to have her childhood, to believe and have all the "normal" things every other kid has. Now I realize, bad luck, jobs lost, illness etc. can affect any kid's childhood. But the disregard of an adult, or "joy killing" behaviors of an adult to a child to me is something I can't let go or find humor in. Again not the best example but I think it makes my point. Laugh about a car accident where no one is hurt, the insurance pays for everything....absolutely, an inconvenience but no harm done in the end. But somethings i can't laugh off. That said this is a good reminder for me as it's an area I need to do better with, starting with discernment.
Like it - the first thing to go when I obsess about my A is my sense of humour - I forget to smile and to laugh and this carries into all aspects of my life such that I appear as miserable or serious - or worse sarcastic and cynical!