The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
For most of my life holidays were a very difficult time for me. All I could count on was that I would feel deprived, angry and sad.
This year one of my neighbors is an alcoholic (in early recovery) who feels deprived, angry and sad 24/7. After my exposure to her somehow I was able to give up the life long trend of making every day especially the holidays a misery. I no longer compared every facet of my life to imaginary others
I certainly can't say my holidays were easy I worked through most of them and felt very very tired. At the same time I did not spend them being miserable, feeling left out or resenting others.
Somehow or another with this new flip in attitude I no longer fear the future and I no longer am obsessed with what others got and I didn't!
I'm certainly not in a great place financially, my job is certainly not what I would want to do and I'm looking at having to do a second job for a lot longer than I'd like to.
What's different is that I no longer see my current situation as set in stone. I know there will be a way out and I have to trust in that. Of course I'd like a way out right now but I'm willing to work on what is rather than what it should be.
Every day I'm grateful for whatever life brings me, crazy people, addicts, awful bosses, coworkers from hell. Whatever it is I know I can cope and no longer fall victim to poor me or why me?
I trust you will all have a wonderful new year and I look forward to sharing so much with you in 2011.
Maresie.
-- Edited by maresie on Thursday 30th of December 2010 06:41:06 PM
"Every day I'm grateful for whatever life brings me, crazy people, addicts, awful bosses, coworkers from hell. Whatever it is I know I can cope and no longer fall victim to poor me or why me?"
What wonderful recovery! I am just in awe! When you can be grateful for that, you've got it licked, in my estimation.
Hugs, Temple
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It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
I love the Christmas and new year holidays, always have. But I know many people do not enjoy this time of year at all. It is a bad time for my ah, he has a terrible time coping. So glad to hear about your attitude adjustment, way to go!
Thanks for a fabulous share about the Promises, .... exactly what I needed today!
I was once told, "Victims do not recover." I will need to remember this as I come out of vacation mode and get ready to work New Years Eve and New Years Day. It helps me, that you mention Gratitude... that always sparks an attitude adjustment for me. Thank you!
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The prayer isn't for Higher Power to change our lives, but rather to change us.
Great thread A few years ago I became disabled ( my husband already disabled) I lost my dream job and along with that we lost everything of value that we owned. We have never been rich by any means but have always had a comfortable lifestyle. I was horrified when little by little things were being removed from our home, was so embarrased about what the neighbors would think of us. Cried when they came to repo my dream car...spent alot of time on the pity pot. We were reduced to applying for food stamps for a while...again i was humiliated praying no one i knew would see me in the store. But once I joined the fellowship i started to find graitude in the smallest things and then amazed myself by finding out how so many of our "things" we were able to live without. All of a sudden "things" didn't mean much to me anymore. I had a roof over my head, food to eat and clothing to wear. HP made sure I had what I needed but not nessesarily what i wanted. Funny thing afterwards i found many of my neighbors going through the same struggles and they certainly were not glued to thier windows watching our possesions leave our home because frankly they had thier own issues to deal with. Today we have enough to barely get by and it is okay with me. I have learned never to covet any other persons life or lifestyle because no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. I have a wonderful husband, a son newly in recovery and a beautiful daughter who chooses to be estranged from us right now, she just finished up her BA and going for her teaching credentials. I can't ask for much more. Blessings
Sometimes I see frustration and hardship at every turn. At other times I do know deep in my heart that I am on a road and that I have more tools than I once had.
I do know now that living with an alcoholic in an intimate manner is not something I can do again. I also know that alcoholics are everywhere and that life is definitely not perfect without one in a partnership!
I did not believe I could do it on my own but I am now walking and sometimes running towards a better life. Every day is a great challenge but every day I get to learn more skills to be more effective, joyous and free of resentment.
I did not believe I could do it on my own but I am now walking and sometimes running towards a better life. Every day is a great challenge but every day I get to learn more skills to be more effective, joyous and free of resentment.
Maresie.
Dear Maresie
What a powerful share for the New yar. Such wisdom and hope You are certainly on the Road to a Better life
