The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
ugh i have to work on this... my trying to control it.
i told ah i did not want to "do" christmas with his relatives on xmas eve -- which we have done for years but i hate it. as to them christmas is time for a "piss-up" as they call it.i am just tired of ah and everyone else being hungover or sleeping on christmas morning while the kids are opening gifts. or keeping me up all night with their rowdiness. or screaming at each other.
i wish we could have christmas eves like mine growing up, watching xmas movies together, eating popcorn by the fire, just being cozy.
anyway he did agree to it -- we're doing it xmas day instead --- but ended up on a binge tonight. i just was woken up hearing him drunkenly ranting on the phone to his A brother.. and chain smoking in the house. hate that (we have an asthmatic kid)
so now the binge will be two nights - tonight and xmas day - instead of just xmas eve.
Wishing you a little peace for Christmas Please know the meeting room will be manned all day with volunteer in case anyone needs to come in for some comfort, understanding and we will be there to listen Blessings
I am so so sorry :( We want holidays to be special and happy, yet when there is an A in the mix...they become miserable and dreaded. Just wrap yourself around your kids and block out everything else as much as possible and enjoy your time and makes your Christmas the best it can be for yourself and your children.
It's not only you going through these struggles. Reading your post makes me realize I am not the only one. My A and were on a high and then as soon as thanksgiving hit everything took a turn for the worst. Maybe it is the holidays that sets them off too many obligations. Just be positive.
I am not an A and holidays are hard on me. Even though I don't celebrate them anymore. I was blessed most my young life with great holidays with a huge family.
We may not have celebrated the event as I got older, but we still got together as we had all that time off.
This time is very hard with all the commercials, trying to shop, radio, its everywhere.
If one cannot celebrate it, no money,no family etc all this is a huge weight.
I can imagine an A who already feels guilty enough, feels they cannot measure up most days but holidays forget it.
I would say love your family, be with them, detach from the A. The important things is that, being with the ones we love, nothing is more precious. We can make our thoughts go where we wish them to.
Detach Detach, does not matter what the A does, what are you going to do?
