The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I can imagine there are lots of new people at this time of the year all with their own heartbreaking stories.
I have only just heard of al anon and went to my first and only meeting last week. I went expecting to be given advice on how to help an AH and was stunned at what really took place. So much of it hit home although some of it hit a nerve and was hard to take in. I spent the whole meeting with tears running down my face and didn't really speak but I was made to feel so welcome and the people were so lovely.
I am a newly married and didn't think anyone else would understand as I always associated AH with an older man or woman on a street corner with a bag of drink in their hand. Oh how wrong I was. I'm not even R0 and I feel like I'm 90. I hope this board along with the meeting (if I find the courage to go again) can help me finally come to terms with my life
Hello and welcome , what you experienced at your first meeting is a gift -acceptance and unconditional love .. embrace it dont walk away . Tears heal cry as much as you need to no one tells u to stop or to grow up they just let you be . this program will change your life for the better you have no idea where this can take you . merry xmas Falon Louise
Welcome here Fallon... Alanon has changed my life, for the better. Before alanon I lived thinking I had to take care of every one else and everything else, and didn't even look at me, at all, ever. My alanon's disease symptoms include: codependency, trying to control, trying to manipulate, focusing on every other thing and person I could. I would obsess all day long and never realized that if I focused on me and began to do the forgiveness work I needed to do, I would have died feeling awful. Alanon and CODA have woken me up to a new world. I realize now that I need to focus on me and me alone. I ask my HP for help and my sponsor guides me along the way. I am working the steps and using the tools the program offers that work for me. The book The New COdependency has helped me understand things tremendously. Also, Courage to Change, Getting them Sober and The Language of Letting Go. Alanon is for you, to heal you and welcome here :) Take care of you now ;) Just for today....
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You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. -Buddha
The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exsist. Ours only is the present's tiny point. -Mahmud Shabistanri
(((Fallon))) I am very happy that you have already taken the first step in your recovery by attending your first face 2 face Al-Anon meeting. Al-Anon is a wonderful program that will change your life for the better. Keep going back to your meetings, listen and learn, it only gets better.
What you experienced is the feeling of not being alone anymore. I was like you when I attended my first f2f meeting, I wanted someone to tell me how to get my AW to stop drinking. I was told the program was about me and for me. I was told to always take care of myself first, that I could be happy whether the alcoholic in my life was drinking or not. The slogans were only words. The tools of the program? I didn't have a clue.
What I did understand was that I had found a new home. A home with members that accepted me and understood as perhaps no one else could. The old timers at my meeting had serenity and shared their experience, strength, and hope freely. I knew I wanted what they had. I wanted it overnight. I came to realize that nothing happens overnight, it happens one day at a time.
I'm glad you found MIP, lots of wonderful people here who want you to have what they have, the peace and serenity that comes when you apply the Al-Anon program to your everyday life. Keep coming back.
I went to my first meeting with the idea that it was going to save my relationship by telling me how to get through to my A. :) What I found was something to save MY life. Because of Al-anon and me applying it, my A had the space to work out his own issues and get back into recovery. Al-anon has changed every aspect of my life as it is applied to each area.
I cried through my first meeting as I felt so hopeless. I was an emotional basket case and was so completely overwhelmed with the results of the disease I just didn't know where to start. It is amazing looking back what it was like then.
There are times I still feel like I'm gonna lose it. The good part is that those times are much fewer and farther in between and when I feel like that, it passes quickly and clarity and serenity set in. Al-anon gave me the tools I need to handle anything.
How wonderful you felt accepted there. I keep going back as I need to do what is good for myself, and so far Al-anon is the best thing I have ever done. I am worth it and so are you. :)
Aloha Fallon...keep coming back...here and the meeting. We have already started loving you and will continue to do that right up to and including where you learn to love yourself. (((((hugs)))))
Hi Fallon- I am new also and debating on going to a meeting, exactly for the reason you said... I am already so surprised at what I am learning just on here as far as focusing on myself.. its like, why do I need to change? But I guess I do and your post brought me to tears, along with everyone else's replies on here... I think I am going to go to a meeting as soon as I can (which is hard with a baby and a full time job!) Keep me updated on things.... I can definitely relate to feeling overwhelmed with all of this. Its not what I was expecting but everyone has been so kind... I feel like I have to just give it a try.
