I'll hold your hand!

It's new and it's different -- and it will all become comfortable and familiar in time.  Be gentle with yourself and give yourself that time to adjust.

As I type, there are a couple of boxes behind me still packed from my move here three years ago.  And that's okay.  (I gotta wonder if the stuff in there is so important if I haven't touched it in three years! )

Good for you for signing up for that team!

Oh hon.

Moving is a HUGE stress on us. HUGE. Even if it is a very good thing, you have suffered a million losses! Our brain takes awhile to get used to it.

Think about it, your toothbrush,  your silverwear, your hammer, EVERYTHING is in a different place. Sounds like right now, things are still in boxes and don't have a place.

You know how irritating it is when we cannot find something? Everytime you want or need something you cannot just go to it anymore. Your brain has to work until it is familiar.

"courage is letting go of familiar" Just read that today. You know I am fighting have to leave the only thing that is familiar to me.
This place did not feel home until two years ago, been here eleven!  I used to be scared to walk up to the barn in the dark, now I just go without thought.

You are feeling natural feelings. I sure did relate to your share. It takes time to meet nieghbors, get used to stores you like, where you get gas, get used to driving back to where you are living!

Losing that which is familiar is HUGE. When we lose a loved one, it does the same thing to us, as nothing is familiar again. We go thru life with out that person, have to get used to that.

It is totally different to live in town! I sure know what you mean. What I honestly believe is when you get your stuff out, it will be home. As time goes on, things will be familiar.

I had to work at making this house my home. It was my and AH's home. I moved to the bunkhouse and back. Hated it. then moved back to the bunkhouse. It was too hard being out there, so came back to the house.

At first, I felt like you. Been here two years now, it is home, very much so. I did feel the alone thing too!

If I am so nice why aren't my friends calling and coming out? Why are my kids too busy? People know AH is gone, a lot of my good friends died, family all did.

Again I worked on that. I got to know my neighbors. One becuz they dog kept coming to my house, then she got older, they got a puppy and they both came! Another their llamas, alpacas and donkey took off down the road, no one was home so I got them back.

Another two walk by everyday, now we are close neighbors that will help each other.

YOU will be ok but it is very normal and ok to feel as you do. I know that feeling of wanting to go home. I want to go to my Mothers sit on the couch, her on her recliner, drink tea and laugh and talk. Nice and warm. Stay overnignt and sleep in the comfy twin bed with my huge dog.

Feel safe, warm and secure.

TLC now I feel that way in my bed surrounded by my dogs. I have learned to call on two of my friends again. I let them know when I feel icky. We talk and I feel better, them too.

We do get tired!! I finally was able to learn to let things sit until I felt like doing them. Learned to "change jobs" stop painting and lay a floor, stop cleaning the deck off, plant flowers instead.

Hon it does not matter really what is making you feel like this, you just do. For me accepting that, and going ahead and crying, take a shower, I might get lost in a novel.

Yes the physically being alone is so darn hard sometimes. Myself I am choosing to learn how to make myself ok with it. I don't want to go thru the losing someone again.

As you begin to get routines going, it will get easier. Myself I always go to the same stores, gas stations whatever, I listen and talk to people. I begin to care. I know if I needed something, they know they can trust me so it helps.

I mean if I forget my cash or whatever.

If you can, calling someone does help, it really does. We are really who we are inside, not this body. When we share on the phone our hearts are talking. It really is ok to say you are lonely.

I just called my friend as I was so scared. Was the first thing I said in my tears. It did help.

Yep right now you feel bad. It is ok to just grab your dogs and get back in bed and read! Did you ever read, "The Farside" by Gary Larson that cartoonist? The movie Uncle Buck always makes me laugh.

Even if you don't feel like it, can you find your dvd player? Vcr? (c: Even though ya don't feel like it, it is ok to pop in a movie and go there awhile.

If you eat ice cream, I invite you to eat some Ben and Jerrys, the whole thing....

Hugs, love,debilyn

Hang in there - the feeling is temporary and it will pass.

Tantrum away! I think a tantrum in an appropriate environment (i.e. here, or out in the yard by yourself, etc.) is perfectly great! You can get the negative energy out - and maybe get a chuckle out of yourself doing it, too. :)