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Well to be honest, I dont think interventions work, because the addict has to want to stop to begin with. They cant go sober for anyone but themselves, crying, pleading, begging manipulating, threats, ultimatums, none of it works.
That was Alanons motto for awhile in California anyway in the late 80's "Gotta Wanna", that says it all.
I guess that you could call my first attempt to have my son address his alcoholism an intervention.
I called the rehab that his father had attended and had been recovered in. Two of his father's former counselors were there after 20 years and agreed to interview Stephen . The intake office also agreed to accept him if he would go.
They did call him and he agreed to see them. They went to his home visited and then he accepted the suggestion to go to inpatient detox/ rehab . The facility was located an 8 hours drive from his home and they drove him there that day.
It was a 45 day program and he stayed for the full time at the cost of over 20,000.00
He drank the same day he was discharged
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 29th of November 2010 10:23:21 PM
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 29th of November 2010 10:24:11 PM
Aloha sdisnie; The only interventions I've been involved in were from inside the program (12th steps) and as a Behavioral Health Therapist for an I/O rehab for substance abuse and alcoholism. Honesty and willingness of the parts of the participants especially the addicted intended client is required and then there is no guarantee as has already been mentioned and yes...it is very expensive financially. Spending that kind of money on an unconvinced person addicted to mind and mood altering chemicals has lower odds than a craps shoot (dice gambling). The higher percentages are in social model program attendance which are AA and Al-Anon or the like. Since it is someone other than the addicted person calling for the intervention it goes to reason that the interest in getting clean and sober is still from the wrong direction. Sometimes it works most times not. Interventions were once considered a method of "raising the bottom" of the alcoholic or addict so that they would seek sobriety...more so now jails and institutions do a better job but not by much. Alcoholism is such a very cunning, powerful and baffling disease. Read further back on the post from earlier members who talk about the rehab experience or multiple rehab experiences where the addict or alcoholic returned to drinking and using the day they were released. As a counselor I saw more of that than anything.
I usually suggest that the family, spouse, friend or associate of the alcoholic or addict call AA or NA and have someone willing to do a 12th step go to the person and have a face to face talk about the "problem".
(((((hugs)))))
The last "intervention" I did was a 12th step on a "wet" drunk. I was called by a member of my Wednesday Night Turning Point Al-Anon Family Group who knew I was a member of both programs. I did the work with him and her at the same time...he drank during it...maybe heard and understood what was being done and said...showed no willingness to stop drinking...he and their situation deteriorated...police were called...he was threatened with loosing a high profile, high paying job...went to rehab...came home and started drinking right away...went to a more expensive very notable institution...came back home and as of last Sunday had 7 solid months of recovery. He is an alcoholic and a very different man. He will always be alcoholic while at the same time being happy, joyous and free. I guess you can call the whole thing an intervention designed and guided by God.
-- Edited by Jerry F on Tuesday 30th of November 2010 02:18:16 AM
As far as I know interventions dont work - if you attempt one it takes along time to plan u need a professional its rehearsed over and over again to be affective . one weak link and the disease wins - again . Nothing works until the alcoholic decides that he is done . Please find meetings for youself u need support its time to think of your own needs and get your life back.
I haven't done a formal intervention - like, get all the family together and go sit the A down and explain all the reasons he needs to go to rehab, no.
That said, I have waited until my AH was very drunk and remorseful about drinking and then badgered him into letting me drive him to detox/rehab right that second. I've done it twice, actually, and talked him into calling the rehab himself and getting a spot the third time. All 3 of these were in the span of a year, and none of them worked. The time between when he went to rehab and when he started drinking got shorter and shorter. The third time, he was only sober a couple of days after he got home. A couple of months later when he actually wanted to stop and made the decision to do so, he stopped - no rehab or inpatient stay.
I think that the times I nagged him into compliance with what I wanted him to do, he really just didn't want to stop yet. As much as I wanted it for him, it wasn't my decision.
After my experiences with this, I don't believe that interventions are effective.
My bf was forced to fly to Florida for a rehab place down there by his parents from the New England area where we live. He was there for 45 days, stayed sober the whole time, worked the program there, what have you. He felt great sober, he said. It cost his insurance company 35,000 dollars. The day he left on his flight home, he drank himself into a black out. When we picked him up at the airport, I knew he was drunk, his parents were blinded and happy to have him home. This was this past August. He hasn't had more than a few days sober since. He didn't want it, so it didn't "take". They have to want it more than anything in the world for it to work. He says he doesn't have a bottom. I am sure he does. I am trying to keep my focus on me now....
__________________
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. -Buddha
The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exsist. Ours only is the present's tiny point. -Mahmud Shabistanri
This all makes sense, I know it does, the only reason we were thinking of doing an intervention is because he is unable to make any decisions for himself at all anymore. He is to the point to where his BAC is over .41 He is unable to hold his bowels for the most part and is pretty much unconscious most of the time. He is hiding in someones house, has nothing but the clothes on his back and is in some sort of black out stage to really not know anything that is going on. So either we just leave him there until his body shuts down and he dies, or try to get him some help, I don't know. I've been sitting back and doing my thing, but this person is dying and truly has no control over it at this time anymore.
Okay, I understand what you're saying. I replied before about just interventions in general.
As far as intervention, I don't know whether it is possible that a very ill individual as you describe could even understand what was happening. In my opinion (this is just mine, and not meant to be advice), I think it's definitely okay to seek medical attention for someone that is very ill - just as I would seek it for someone having a heart attack or appendicitis.
I have to agree with White Rabbit. It doesn't sound like an "intervention" would work because the A is pretty much unconcious. I, personally, could not at least try to get the A medical attention because he is so horribly ill. Alcoholism is a disease and will result in death if not stopped. Tough decisions and choices...
I understand that situation all too well. I have called 911 for help and the ER doctors have admitted him to the psych ward. This ensured that he would be on a 72 hour hold, could be detoxed and could not discharge himself.
This is a life threatening disease and medical help is essential.
I am not convinced interventions work. I begged my A to get some help and he didn't. Our son was devastated not having his dad. I finally got tired of it and decided to aid the process of having him hit his bottom. It worked wonders and a few years ago he went to rehab.
Sometimes an intervention puts some people on the road to recovery and other times it doesn't. I don't know that there is a fixed route to getting someone sober.