The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi all, my wife & kids & I have been at her parents home for Thanksgiving for the week. We are going home tomorrow. Overall, the visit has been good. My wife has done well and has gone to 3 AA meetings up here (we are over 400 miles from home). But I'm at my wits end and feeling really really anxious at this moment. My wife was just out by herself for a half hour or so and she seems fine but I'm just so consumed with whether or not she drank or got booze. It's to the point that I noticed she was chewing gum when she got home and started to read too much into that. It's been a trying week for her, even though things have gone pretty well. My in-laws have had the kids out for hours and I expected them home quite a while ago.
Anyway, I just needed to vent for a minute. I know I need to just relax and let it go, but every word that anyone says is just driving me crazy.
Happy Thanksgiving Use to be...she made 3 meetings and how many were available to you? It's a great day to let go of her...she isn't your problem you are...that's loving not a put down. Had you kept the focus on yourself your post would have been different and you can do that at anytime you wish. I use to set my alcoholic wife up for failure by focusing on her so intently. There was absolutely no way she would pass my inspection and it was a gift to her arriving sobriety that I got out of the way. It also helped my own recovery. See if you can get to a meeting 400 miles away from your home and listen to the program from the distant family. As long as you are working on her you are not on vacation. In support...(((((hugs)))))
-- Edited by Jerry F on Friday 26th of November 2010 03:54:48 PM
-- Edited by Jerry F on Friday 26th of November 2010 03:55:25 PM
Thanks Jerry, you are right on the money. I think I just was worn out today after a long week...Looking forward to being home tomorrow and getting back in my routine.
I've been in that place - it happens. Good that you are able to recognize that putting the focus back where it belongs is the key. It's hard to do, but with practice it will become a lot easier.