The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I was really really struggling with letting go of my illusion of "control" over my A, and her drinking.... I was a "fixer" at work, and many of us (perhaps men even moreso) are "fixers" in everyday life, and are often rewarded as such.... So after a couple of years of literally making myself crazy and frustrated, my wise old sponsor said to think of it like the weather....
"Tom, you have about as much control & influence over your A as you do over the weather outside.... Can you change the weather? Of course not..... But you CAN wear a heavy jacket, or take an umbrella, or things like that."
That one always stuck with me.... Al-Anon, this board, and other recovery tools are my jacket and/or umbrella...
Take care Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
You are so right on a lanon and MIP are the coverings (sometimes bullet proof) they enables me to move thru this world with, compassion. serenity and courage
Really appreciate the great reminder
Have a Happy Thanksgiving
Oh I forgot Do you celbrate Thanksgiving in Canada?
Thanks for the analogy - I'm trying to really accept that I don't control the weather. Lots of magical thinking in my life in the past - reading "Getting Them Sober," seeing that's pretty normal based on coming from an A household.
I don't control the weather. (Repeat as needed)!
Thanks!
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"It isn't what happens to us that matters, but how we choose to interpret it and react."
