The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It's really silly, for the most part, because I experienced these feelings just from watching a reality TV show! I've been watching "Ice Road Truckers - Deadliest Roads" (I find it fascinating... they're driving these scary dangerous roads through the Himalayas in India). Each trucker was assigned a local Indian spotter to help them along their way.
One of the truckers - the only woman trucker out of the bunch - has a spotter that just doesn't seem to trust her driving abilities whatsoever. In the last episode I was watching last night, she decided she wanted to take a trip without him and she went through the familiar anxiety of having to tell him she didn't want him riding in the truck with her.
The funny thing was as I was watching I had this pile of emotions bubble up in me when she was telling the spotter she wanted him to just take the day off and let her make the trip on her own.
I kept feeling sorry for the guy, that she must be hurting his feelings... or scared that he was going to get angry... but at the same time I understood she wanted to go it without him sitting in the car barking instructions at her for hours on end.
The situation had absolutely NOTHING to do with me, but I started taking ownership in it!
Really amazing how I feel responsible for others... and that base drive I have in me to make sure everyone is okay comes roaring to the forefront so easily.
I relate so much, goes a long with my post below about not taking things personally. Or taking on things that aren't mine to take on, like a TV show. I had always been worried about everyone else and had no care about me. I am taking that back, even though I never had it....I am gaining it. :) Thanks for this share!
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You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. -Buddha
The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exsist. Ours only is the present's tiny point. -Mahmud Shabistanri
Yes, I too can relate as well. Both my parents are "children of alcoholics" but my mom is a "spectacular enabler" and always showed me how to feel badly for everyone else except myself. I had felt guilty for awhile before I began learn new habits. I`am still a work in progress as we all are. Thanks for this great share...
