The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have posted only once to this board and am not sure my situation fits with or "qualifies" as al-anon. While my wife may abuse alcohol (as do I and I am beginning to understand the affect this may be having on our relationship) I don't know that she is an alcoholic or that our problems come directly from her drinking. She does not go out drinking, does not drink and drive, does not drink enough to pass out or get sick and is an amazingly reliable employee. She is, however, an ACoA. Her family are non recovering A's and up until recently have been very much a part of our lives. Her behaviors and relationship skills sound very similar to someone who is an alcoholic and an ACA.... I am hurting and lost and have been able to take away so much support from all of the posts I have read. I read Courage to Change and a few other affirmation books which help me to focus on myself and how I am dealing (or not) dealing with this situation. Is it ok to post about my ACA?....and her A family ? I actually worry she may eventually become an A as well....
Qualifications to join this program - if you have lived or do live ,if you love or have loved an alcoholic you belong .. It really dosent matter how much or how often someone drinks what matters is how it affect you when they do , that Al -Anon can help u with . Both of her parents drink and that effects her and as her husb you .. yes it is okay for you to be here . welcome Please find meetings for yourself u need support . this is just too hard to do alone . Louise
Anyone whose life is affected by someone else's drinking "qualifies." It's also a tendency of alcohol abuse that we lose sight of what "normal" looks like, and I've noticed many people (me included) start out by saying, "My problems are minor comparied to what others are experiencing." But it doesn't matter how minor they are, and also we tend to lose perspective and not realize how our thoughts have become distorted by alcohol. It sounds as if you are starting your journey back to serenity already. Welcome and keep coming back!
Of course you can post. The only requirement is that you have been effected by someone else's drinking. It does not matter whether your wife is and alcoholic or not. Whether she is or whether she isn't an alcoholic I admire your concern and an the fact that you have and are reaching out for support.
This is the right place for you to start your recovery. You state you have read Courage To Change. Have you attended any face to face Al-Anon meetings in your area? If you haven't I would strongly recommend you find a meeting. They can be found in your local phone book. This board is great and you will receive wonderful experience, strength, and hope from members with years in the program. But nothing can replace f2f meetings where you will be surrounded by other members who are walking or have walked in your shoes. Try at least 6 meeting and then decide if Al-Anon is right for you. From your nickname "movingforward" I can tell you in advance Al-Anon is your ticket to serenity and a better way of life.....
Keep coming back, continue to post on MIP, you have found a new family and most important......your not alone anymore.
Well patterns are learned at a pretty young age for most people. I don't see what is wrong with posting about ACOA issues. There is a board for ACOA and they may well go into some more depth about the subjects.
I took a very very long time to feel I qualified for this program. I am so grateful I am here.
Welcome You definitly belong here. Many of us here are not just alanons but we are also ACOA's and ACA's. But for me working the Alanon program encompasses all those issues for me, others go to alanon plus one or more of those other specfic programs. We also have many people who are in AA and NA working their recovery in those programs but also belong here. So you will get here Love, Support and a boat load of experience on all fronts. I hope you look into alanon meetings in your area and start attending. It is an amazing program that not only help you understand and learn coping tools that are so helpful in dealing with the alcolic but in all aspects of your life. Blessings
? I actually worry she may eventually become an A as well....
