When do I say I can't do this anymore? - Al-Anon Family Group

pocerutuf · Newbie

When do I say I can't do this anymore?

All I can be · Senior Member

Hi pocer.

In my mind its always a good idea to give up drinking. Especially if you dont want to.

If you both have personality flaws, as everyone I know does... Drinking is a fuse for the bomb.

1 Stop drinking
2 Join AA
3 Get a sponsor
4 Work the AA steps

I can only fix me not others.

All the best
Bill

Andrea12 · ~*Service Worker*~

((((((((((((Welcome)))))))))))))<hugs

First of all congradulations to taking the first step....weather you know it or not you have just admitted you are powerless...setp 1.

There is no easy fix....where there is life there is always hope. I wish the best to you and your new wife. Please remember you can only control your own actions. You have to both work your own programs to become successful in recovery.

She has suggested alanon to you which tells me she knows about AA. Try to find a local meeting of alanon in your area. Keep coming back....we have meetings here every day and every evening please join in.

Know most of all you are not alone.

With Hope,
andrea

-- Edited by Andrea12 on Saturday 4th of September 2010 03:45:33 PM

Bettina · ~*Service Worker*~

Sounds like its a recipe for disaster if you both dont get the help and support you both need.

You have already reached out so you have done the most important step already.

find a face to face Alanon meeting near you and go.

Wishing you the best. Bettina

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

To gether for 10 married for days and you want to give up ??? Yikes Please find Al-Anon quick give this program a few months before u make a life altering decission . At this point in your life u really have nothing to loose and alot to gain . good luck Louise

pocerutuf · Newbie

where/how do I go to get set up with face to face meetings?

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Pocerutuf

Welcome To answer to your question: If you have been affected by someone elses drinking then Al-Anon is for you!

By going to the following link:

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html

We also have on line meetings here, in the Chat room, 2xs a day.
Please keep coming back You and your marriage are worth it.

i

mjhyankees · Senior Member

Lots of good advice here, not much to add.....work on yourself, it's all you can do.

xeno59 · ~*Service Worker*~

Definitly get yourself to some meetings, get liturature and learn all you can about this disease and how to cope in a healthy way. If you feel you have a drinking problem to I would suggest AA also. Lots of double winners meaning many people qualify for both alanon and AA.
I hope you reach out and seek help
Blessings on your journey

maresie · ~*Service Worker*~

I've certainly been in many a volatile argument. What I've learned in al anon is that I can choose which arguments I join. To get there took a lot of practice. Nowadays when people make certain remarks to me I can "choose" my reaction rather than launch in.

Alcohol can certainly lubricate all those boundaries about arguing, breaking up and more.

If you go to an open AA meeting you will hear many a story. The upshot is that its never too late to turn some things around. People don't get sober and enter a fairy tale, they are better able to cope with life.

I'm glad you are here.

Maresie.

pocerutuf · Newbie

Thank you all for your kindness and information.... I really do hope that I can find the answers that I'm looking for at Alanon :)

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.